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Tue Jul 25, 2006 9:04 am TOEFL essay sample: Big Brother - show or reality? |
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Hello Alan. I am from Bulgaria and now I am preparing about Toefl. This is my first essay. I will be happy to see your opinion.
TOEFL essay sample
Big Brother - show or reality?
Every year some people in different countries play the game called Big Brother. Three monts this people live in one house without TV, computers, telephone,friends ,family and social contacts. Somethimes they live whithout enought food. This people are trying to show their real life to every people, who are watching this game. I am from Bulgaria. Big Brother is the show whit the best popularity in my country. The people just like this show. But Is this a reality or this is only show? I was watched all seasons of Big Brother in Bulgaria and I think that all people go to Big Brother"s house with one aim - to win the money.Some of them are possible to make everything about this. I think that all people in the house are trying to be someone else,but It is unpossible. They can play roles one or two week,but after that they show us a real characters,because It is difficult to be an actor three months, 24 hours a day between four walls and 20 cameras. What people want to see, show or reality? What is more interesting? I think that people want to see persons, who are attractive,but not actors. If they want to see actors,they will go to the cinema. The people want to find homself in this persons. I think that Big Brother is a combination from show and reality.When the cameras are with you 24 hours a day is too difficult to make only show. But for me Big Brother is experiment to every person to find himself. _________________ I am from Bulgaria |
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bulgarian I'm new here and I like it ;-)
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 24
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Tue Jul 25, 2006 14:25 pm TOEFL essay sample: Big Brother - show or reality? |
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Hi bulgarian,
My suggestions are in CAPITAL letters:
| Quote: | Every year some people in different countries play the game called Big Brother. Three montHs THESE people live in one house without TV, computers, telephone,friends ,family and social contacts. Sometimes they live whithout enought/WITHOUT ENOUGH food. This/THESE people are trying to show their real life to everyBODY (people) who are watching this game. I am from Bulgaria. Big Brother is the show whit/WITH the best popularity in my country. The people just like this show. But Is this a reality EVENTor this is only A show? I was/HAVE watched all seasons of Big Brother in Bulgaria and I think that all people go to Big Brother"s house with one aim - to win the money.FOR Some of them are/IT IS possible to make everything about this. I think that all THE people in the house are trying to be someone else,but It is unpossible/IMPOSSIBLE. They can play roles one or two weekS,but after that they show us a/THEIR real characters,because It is difficult to be an actor three months, 24 hours a day between four walls and 20 cameras. What DO people want to see, A show or reality? What is more interesting? I think that people want to see persons/PEOPLE, who are attractive,but not actors. If they want to see actors,they will go to the cinema. The people want to find homself/THEMSELVES in this/THESE persons. I think that Big Brother is a combination from/OF show and reality.When the cameras are with you 24 hours a day IT is too difficult to make only A show. But for me Big Brother is AN experiment to every person to find himself. |
Alan _________________ English as a Second Language You can read my ESL story 'the' vs. 'a/an' |
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Alan Co-founder

Joined: 27 Sep 2003 Posts: 7191 Location: UK
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Mon Jun 30, 2008 23:05 pm TOEFL essay sample: Big Brother - show or reality? |
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I am sorry , but are you sure that you are from Bulgaria?
If you were so brave to write "I am bulgarian", then why didn't you write your name?
And by the way, the fact that you enjoy watching big brother does not mean that it is ...how did you say it? .."with the best popularity" |
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Elisa New Member
Joined: 30 Jun 2008 Posts: 1
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Sun Jul 20, 2008 9:50 am TOEFL essay sample: Big Brother - show or reality? |
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| "their life" instead of their real life. "to everyone" would be better than people |
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innocent114 New Member
Joined: 20 Jul 2008 Posts: 1
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| I got my TOEFL score + question about the test | TOEFL essay example: Some people like living in the small town, others like... |