TOEFL® essay sample: If public transportation in a large city

[Janice]

Alan, could you give me some commons about my essay again?
THANKS!

TOEFL essay sample

In your opinion, if public transportation in a large city were free, would enough people leave their cars at home to significantly reduce traffic congestion?


In my opinion, many people would leave their cars at home to significantly reduce traffic congestion if public transportation in a large city were free. It is because taking public transits is much cheaper and safer, and is beneficial to the environment that I agree to it.

First of all, people could save a lot of money if the cost of riding on buses and skytrains were free. Not only can people save money on taking free public transits, but also on gasoline, car repair’s fee, and insurances. As the gasoline price is raising dramatically high, it is even better to transport by buses from place to place. Therefore, people could definitely save a large amount of money by using public transport.

Besides , travelling by buses is safer than driving. Statistics have shown that one person is being killed everyday in Canada from car accident, and often the people who are killed are not the people who cause the accident. Also, if the buses were damaged, passengers do not need to fix. This saves their money and time. In addition, all bus drivers are qualified drivers who will drive at the proper speed, so the passengers’ safety is ensured and more people are willing to ride on the bus.

Furthermore, lots of people would prefer to take buses and skytrains instead of driving because it is beneficial to the environment. When fewer cars are running on the roads, fewer pollutants are being emitted to the atmosphere. This, in turn, can dramatically decrease the chances of acid rain, global warming, and the creation of smog, thus making our world a cleaner place to live in.

All in all, there would be enough people to choose to take public transits instead of driving their own cars if public transportation were free. Admittedly, some people may still feel that driving cars is more convenient but taking buses offers much more advantages than driving. I wish that public transportation would be free someday in our country.

[Alan]

Hi janice,

Again my suggestions are in capital letters: