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Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have?



 
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Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have? #1 (permalink) Sun Nov 18, 2012 11:51 am   Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have?
 

***
Topic67: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are never satisfied with what they have; they always want something more or something different.
***

Some people may think that human beings are satisfied with what they now have. However, I do not go along with this opinon. For one thing, people have always made new products. In addition, people tend to want something much more than what they actually need.

First of all, people are trying to develop a lot of new products without being satisfied with current products. For instance, mobile phones are this kind of a example. In the past, people created mobile phones to call other people anytime and somewhere. However, because people wanted to have more various functions for mobile phones, mobile phones today are developing rapidly and they have various features, such as camera, a calender and so on. In the end, although people created smartphones too, plenty of people are not entirely satisfied with current smartphones and want companies to create more newer one.

Next, a numer of people have many items that they cannot use up during their lives. For instance, clothes and shoes are these kinds of examples. Some people really like to buy clothes and shoes. I do not intend to condemn this, but some of them tend to like to possess clothes and shoes rather than wear them. My friend is also one of them. She is really interested in a fasion and she wears different clothes whenever I see her. According to her, she likes not only to have on fashionable clothes and shoes every day but also spend time going to stores and purchasing them. That is to say, she is mania about clothes and shoes. This kinds of people do never stop to pursue what they love and want something of difference.

To sum up, scores of people cannot abandon their. People create new and different products even though their functions are as good as old one. Moreover, some of them have a tendency to be crazy about their favorites.

TOEFL listening discussions: Why are these young men in conversation?
Doshima
I'm here quite often ;-)


Joined: 23 Jun 2012
Posts: 132
Location: Japan

Re: Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have? #2 (permalink) Sun Nov 18, 2012 16:11 pm   Re: Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have?
 

I thought this was pretty good. Your examples were ok, but maybe you could have explored the fact that this desire for something new can be both good and bad. Your first paragraph shows it in a good light I think, since this desire is driving technological progress. Your second paragraph shows the downside, as it can lead to waste and overconsumption. It would have been nice to make this explicit. Your grammar and spelling are good - I have tried to suggest a few more advanced vocabulary words you might have used. Overall, I would rate this a 4 out of 5.

Doshima wrote:
***
Topic67: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are never satisfied with what they have; they always want something more or something different.
***

Some people may think that human beings are satisfied with what they now have. However, I do not go along with this opinon. For one thing, people have always made new products. In addition, people tend to want something much more than what they actually need. {I think it is better to state exactly what you think - "I do not go along with this opinion" is not really a very strong thesis statement and your reasons are not really integrated well with it}

First of all, people are [constantly] trying to develop a lot of new products without being satisfied with current products. For instance, mobile phones are [a perfect] this kind of a example. In the past, people created mobile phones to call other people anytime and somewhere.{"any time and any place"} However, because people wanted to have more various [elaborate] functions for mobile phones, mobile phones today are developing rapidly and they have various[advanced] features, such as [a] camera, a calender and so on. In the end, although people created smartphones too, plenty of people are not entirely satisfied with current smartphones and want companies to create [even] more newer one[s ]. {"more newer" is incorrect and redundant}

Next, a num[b]er of people have many items that they cannot use up {"use up" sounds odd here} during their lives. {maybe "Next, a number of people have many more items than they could possibly need, or even use, no matter how long their lives might last"} For instance, clothes and shoes are these kinds of examples. Some people really like to buy clothes and shoes. I do not intend to condemn this, but some of them tend to like to [simply] possess clothes and shoes rather than wear them. My friend is also one of the[se fashion mavens]. She is really interested in a[the latest] fasion and she wears different clothes whenever I see her. According to her, she likes not only to have on fashionable clothes and shoes every day but also [to] spend time going to stores and purchasing them. That is to say, she is mania[cal] about clothes and shoes. This kinds of people do never stop to pursue what they love and want something of difference. {"want something of difference" sounds odd - do you mean "and always want something different"?}

To sum up, scores of people cannot abandon their.{missing a word here} People create new and different products even though their functions are as good as old one. Moreover, some of them have a tendency to be crazy about their favorites.

TOEFL listening discussions: Why are these young men in conversation?
Luschen
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Joined: 08 Apr 2011
Posts: 6529
Location: Nashville TN, USA

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Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have? #3 (permalink) Mon Nov 19, 2012 11:27 am   Topic67: Are people never satisfied with what they have?
 

Thank you very much for your advice. I appreciate your suggestions because it is still difficult for me to conceive of advanced phrases by myself. In particular, I have really frequently used "various". So, I try to make use of different words next time.
Doshima
I'm here quite often ;-)


Joined: 23 Jun 2012
Posts: 132
Location: Japan

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