TOEFL essay sample: "Films can tell us a lot about...

[Mayson1992]

Films can tell us a lot about the country where they were made. What have you learned about a country from watching its movies? Use specific examples and details to support your response.

I discovered that films can give us the facts about the country where they were filmed. I have learned many facts from the movies. This esssay will shoe the examples and justify my response.

Firstly, I realised that I can learn the country's culture background by wathing at movies. For instance, in the movie 'Godfather' shows the Italian gang purchasing drugs and this demonstrates Italian background. Moreover, we can learn the kind of language what the chracters are speaking in the movie.

Secondly, I have learned the country's daily routine from the films. For example, in the movie 'Memoirs of Geisha' displays that Japanese people wake up in the early morning and work until dinner time. Also, people can discover the country's general manners. Like in the movie 'Harry Potter', students are not permitted to talk back to the teachers.

Thirdly, I can learn the things which people like and dislike. Looking at the film 'Shakespeare is in Love', it discloses that Elizabethan English people like word-plays, theatres and violence but dislike peace and quietness. We can find these facts easily since those are very obvious.

In conclusion, we can find many facts about one particular country by wtaching at the movies. It would be beneficial and enjoyable if we watch the movies.

Can you check my essay and comment on what I need to change? Because I'm taking TOEFL next month.

Thank you so much.

[Alan]

Hi,

I have made some suggestions in CAPITAL letters:

[Mayson1992]

Thank you so much for checking my essay. I'm not sure whether I right it right or wrong. I'm not very sure of TOEFL essay structure. Can you tell me the things that I need to change?