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high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads



 
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high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads #1 (permalink) Mon Sep 02, 2013 9:25 am   high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads
 

Topic: Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold.To what extent do you agree with these views?

Essay:

Nowadays, people in many countries are faced with a tremendous amount of advertisements that try to convince them to buy more products. There is a widely held belief that this amount of ads has strong impact on decision-making power of people to direct them buying what is not really necessary for them. Similarly, to me it seems high demand for many consumer products can be the result of too much advertising.

First and most importantly, thanks to the wide range of mass media’s audiences, producers try to take advantage of these tools benefits to introduce their products. This led more people to be familiar with new things and consequently it gives more chance to goods to be sold. Take for instance a refrigerator with many new facilities or a 3D TV with voice control which are getting a lot of advertising; probably lots of current buyers have previously been unaware of such a products but buying them does not mean simpler products could not meet their needs.

Furthermore, promoting to buy some special goods sometimes conduces to obtain unneeded things; this usually happens for products related to children like junk foods or toys. It is a little bit difficult for parents to ignore their children’s (logically not required) demands and this will cause to buy unnecessary things.

Nevertheless, today’s global financial problems run people to review their shopping baskets to buy only their necessary demands. Moreover because of easier access to information, many buyers do not rely just on ads’ claims. They search on the internet to find products consist with real needs. However due to limited availability of information resources, the number of unneeded goods which are sold outnumbered needed ones.

In conclusion, although people are being to make decisions based on facts not claims, there is a long way yet this becoming a general reality, but in comparison with the past we can conclude that increasing information will get to more accurate choice for buying goods in the near future.

TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture by a professor of History
Amir2000
New Member


Joined: 01 Sep 2013
Posts: 3

Re: high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads #2 (permalink) Tue Sep 03, 2013 14:55 pm   Re: high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads
 

Hi Amir, I thought your essay was pretty good. You have an effective structure and your reasons are relevant and convincing. Your paragraphs are a little short - some more detailed examples would be helpful. Your grammar is not too bad, but you do have a lot of word choices that could be improved and a few odd sounding phrases. Overall, I would rate this a 4 out of 5.

Amir2000 wrote:
Topic: Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold.To what extent do you agree with these views?

Essay:

Nowadays, people in many countries are faced with a tremendous amount of advertisements {"number of advertisements" or "amount of advertising"} that try to convince them to buy more products. There is a widely held belief that this amount [number] of ads has [a] strong impact on [the] decision-making power of people to direct them buying [to buy] what is not really necessary for them. Similarly, to me it seems [a] high demand for many consumer products can be the result of too much advertising.

First and most importantly, thanks to the wide range of mass media’s audiences, producers try to take advantage of these tools['] {what are the tools? the media or the ads or what they are selling?} benefits to introduce their products. This led more people to be familiar with new things{avoid using "things" - be more specific - here you could say "merchandise"} and consequently it gives more chance to goods to be sold. Take for instance a refrigerator with many new facilities[features] or a 3D TV with voice control[,] which are getting a lot of advertising; probably lots of current buyers have previously been unaware of such a products but buying them does not mean simpler products could not meet their needs.

Furthermore, promoting to buy [the purchase of] some special goods [is] sometimes conduces[conducive] to obtain[ing] unneeded things; {I have never really heard "conduces", but I am pretty sure it needs an object - "conduces the purchase of unnecessary things"} this usually happens for products related to children like junk foods or toys. It is a little bit difficult for parents to ignore their children’s (logically not required) {why was this here?} demands and this will cause [them] to buy unnecessary things.

Nevertheless, today’s global financial problems run{"cause" or "force"} people to review their shopping baskets to buy only their necessary demands. Moreover[,] because of easier access to information, many buyers do not rely just on ads’ claims. They search on the internet to find products consist[ent] with [their] real needs. However due to limited availability of information resources, the number of unneeded goods which are sold outnumber[s ] needed ones.

In conclusion, although people are being to[strive] make decisions based on facts [,] not claims, there is a long way yet [to] this becoming a general reality, but in comparison with the past we can conclude that increasing information will get[lead] to more accurate choice[s ] for buying goods in the near future.

TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture by a professor of History
Luschen
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Joined: 08 Apr 2011
Posts: 7124
Location: Nashville TN, USA

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high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads #3 (permalink) Tue Sep 03, 2013 16:20 pm   high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of Ads
 

Hi Mr. Luschen
Thank you very much, those tips you mentioned, are really useful for me.
:)
Amir2000
New Member


Joined: 01 Sep 2013
Posts: 3

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