TOEFL essay: What are some important qualities of a good school teacher?

[Rya82]

What are some important qualities of a good school teacher? Use specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.In my opinion,school teachers perform a major part for every student in each of their lives. They will shape each and every student in studies when viewed on academic side. And it is the duty of every teacher to lead students in a good path in life. So,in my view a good teacher should fulfill the following qualities.
1.kind,and affectionate
2.care and attention to every student
3.should advise students to lead a safe and good path
4.should be smart enough to handle each and every student’s performance in academic activity
5.should encourage students to take part in extra curricular activities apart from studies
6.should be more than a parent in school
7.should come down to the level of student to handle him/her to understand the student perfectly
8.Should know how to handle the student softly without beating or imposing severe punishments

The above points highlights the qualities of a good teacher.but nowadays teachers are not taking proper care for the students and they are not even fulfilling one of the above qualities in some schools. As a result students are leading a very dangerous paths sometimes.
To illustrate the above points,I experienced dealing with teachers who had both negative and positive qualities,teacher with merely positive qualities and teacher with merely negative qualities
I studied in south India and my school days went on well till my fifth grade class. Till that time,my studies were going smoothly and I met one excellent teacher with extensively good qualities(the qualities I mentioned above) and she used to advise students in every step of their life, even when they get a fail mark in exams. As a result,many of the student’s performance drastically changed and resulted in a very good performance on the consequent exam sections. This impressed me a lot and I used to clarify my doubts with that teacher always. After I changed my school because of my father’s transfer and I entered a new school which I had faced a very terrible experience. Teachers in that school always beat the children for nothing. They won’t encourage the students at all. They used to assign very low marks thinking that students will work hard even more to get good marks. My performance went down and I faced lot of problems including lacking self confidence,thoughts of suicidal attempts etc…After I changed my school back to the same school where I studied before(again because of my father’s transfer), I again got very good marks and I was finally relieved from that horrible school.
Thus,I conclude that every student’s life lies within the teacher’s hand. And depends how the teachers treat the students well.

can anyone evaluate my essay please?

[Alan]

HI,

In my opinion,school teachers perform a major part for every student in each of their lives. They will shape each and every student in studies when viewed on THE academic side. And it is the duty of every teacher to lead students in a good path in life. So,in my view a good teacher should DISPLAY the following qualities.
1. BE kind,and affectionate
2.SHOW care and attention to every student
3.should advise students to lead a safe and good path
4.should be smart enough to handle each and every student’s performance in academic activity
5.should encourage students to take part in extra curricular activities apart from studies
6.should be more than a parent in school
7.should come down to the level of studentS to understand the student perfectly
8.Should know how to handle the student GENTLY without beating or imposing severe punishments

The above points highlight the qualities of a good teacher but nowadays teachers are not taking proper care OF theIR students and they are not even fulfilling one of the above qualities in some schools. As a result students are FOLLOWING a very dangerous path sometimes.
To illustrate the above points,I experienced dealing with teachers who had both negative and positive qualities,teacherS with merely positive qualities and teacherS with merely negative qualities
I studied in south India and my school days went well till my fifth grade class. Till that time,my studies were going smoothly and I met one excellent teacher with extensively good qualities(the qualities I mentioned above) and she used to advise students in every step of their life, even when they gOt a fail mark in exams. As a result,many of the studentS' performance drastically changed and resulted in a very good performance IN the FOLLOWING exam sections. This impressed me a lot and I used to clarify my doubts with that teacher always. After I changed my school because of my father’s transfer and I entered a new school WHERE I faced a very terrible experience. Teachers in that school always beat the children for nothing. They DID NOT encourage the students at all. They used to assign very low marks thinking that students WOULD work hard even more to get good marks. My performance went down and I faced lot of problems including lacking self confidence,thoughts of suicidE AfterWARDS I changed my school back to the same school where I studied before(again because of my father’s transfer), I again got very good marks and I was finally FREE OF that horrible school.
Thus,I conclude that every student’s life lies within the teacher’s handS. And depends WHETHER the teachers treat the students well.

Alan
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