With his briefcase in his hand, the manager walked … : forward reference

[Tamara]

Hi

With his briefcase in his hand, the new sales manager walked briskly across the busy road towards his office.

You know, I actually love this funny English tradition to be extremely precise and accurate with own hands, eyes, ears and other personal property.

But this my question is about the style.

Do you consider 'forward reference' is fine (i.e., using his before we know who is the 'he' from the rest of the sentence.)

In Russian the sentence (being directly translated with no any special emphasis)
wouldn’t contain the first two 'his' (his-es ?? :shock: :lol: ).
Just something like: "With briefcase in hand, the manager walked…"
and so, wouldn’t contain 'forward reference' explicitly and wouldn't sound that heavy for my ears.

What do you think about the structure?
_________________
It’s impossible to learn swimming without entering the water…

[Alan]

Hi Tamara,

You could of course say 'briefcase in hand' or 'carrying his briefcase'. The point here is a question of style and to me the repetition of 'his' makes the point that this person is carrying the briefcase with an air of determination. You know the scene in Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens where the boy Oliver asks for more to eat. Now I don't know what the great man actually wrote, off the top of my head, but you could say: Oliver with his little bowl in his little hand asked for more.

Alan
_________________
English as a Second Language
You can read my ESL story Present Simple

[Alan]

Hi Tamara,

I overegged it I'm afraid. The Great Man didn't use 'his' at all!

http://www.teachit.co.uk/attachments/dicex3.pdf

If you read to the end, it says simply 'basin and spoon in hand'

Alan
_________________
English as a Foreign Language
You can read my EFL story Progressive Forms

[Tamara]

Hi Alan,

Thanks, really nice reading for me.

Actually, I also asked about the following (sentence) scheme:
First, <Participle phase with his/her/him/…> and then – <main clause, introducing the subject>.

Personally, I don’t like it (when it’s not a special fiction writing technique).
In Russian, too.
_________________
It’s impossible to learn swimming without entering the water…

[Alan]

Hi,

Can you give me an example?

A
_________________
English as a Second Language
You can read my ESL story Passive Voice

[Tamara]

One example I gave above, in the first post of the thread.
It's from my home exercise on 'Participle Phrases'. )

To illustrate what I mean, I'll try to construct my own sentence, intentionally exaggerating this (cranky) writing style/structure:

Having opened the front door of her house and hardly restrained herself from sharp words against her new neighbours leaving their car right in front of her garage, <the subject> (Mary/a young blonde woman/…) + <the main verb> …
_________________
It’s impossible to learn swimming without entering the water…

[Yankee]

Hi Tamara

I think you'd be less likely to hear a sentence such as both "With his briefcase in his hand, the new sales manager walked ..." and "With briefcase in hand, the new sales manager walked ..." in everyday spoken English.

In spoken English it's more likely that people will start the sentence off with "The new sales manager walked..."

Is that what you wanted to know?

Amy
_________________
"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." ~ Abraham Lincoln

[Alan]

Hi Tamara,

Let's redo that:

[Tamara]

[Tamara]

[Alan]

That's OK because it is the door of the house and the neighbours of the house.

In other words it's all hunky-dory, tickety-boo, even kosher or as everyone says no worries/no problem.

A
_________________
English as a Second Language
You can read my ESL story Make or Do?

[Tamara]