Please check my letter 'Narrative'

[Zaaneetka]

Hi,

I attached here my letter, the topic is 'Narrative'. The story should beginning with words 'last year agnieszka went to australia'. I would be glad if sb could check my grammar etc., because I need it very much. Thanks

Last year Agnieszka went to Australia. I wouldn’t be so excited about it if I hadn’t know that the story shoud be make into a book.

It was late July and as far as I remember the weather was horrible. The rain was so torrential that travelling was very difficult and the gridlock on the streets was enormous. I was waiting for my friend. She promised me to visit me however she didn’t want my help to find my flat. She had only my home address. Agnieszka called me after landing by airoplane and said that she was looking for any lift to take her down from the platform. She had many troubles because her language skills weren’t enough to comminicate. She took a taxi and showed the taxi man my address. During travelling she wrote me a message that everything is as should be and she will be as soon as possible because they were travelling at high speed.

I was waiting for her for 2 hours. She announced me that she will be at 6.00 p.m. However, I couldn’t get through to her. She wasn’t answering her phone. I was scared stiff. I started calling up hospitals if they had any girl named Agnieszka Wislowska, with blue eyes, blond hair and 24 years old. One of them informed me that they have one young girl answering my description but without any documents. I went there as soon as possible. I saw somebody being under life support machine. The heart was beeping with difficulties. I couldn’t even see her face. Suddenly, my phone started ringing. That was Angieszka!. She was shouting at me not to be at home when she arrived. I sighted with relief.

I turned back to home and saw Agnieszka sitting in front of my door number 406 with anger on her face. I gave her a hug and told what had happened. She appologised me for being late because she misheard my address and gave the wrong to the taxi man. However, after a while they came to conclusion that instead of ‘u’ there should ‘n’.

Luckily, everything came to an end. I would be remember this story for ever.

[Mister Micawber]

.
Some corrections:

should be made
promised to visit me,
arriving by airplane
a lift
a lot of trouble
communicate
taxi driver
In the taxi, she wrote
everything was
and she would arrive very soon because
I waited for her
She told me that she would arrive at 6:00
calling hospitals to find out if they had a girl
blonde
informed me that they had
somebody on life support
The monitor was beeping
I couldn't see her face
It was Angieszka!
She was complaining that I was not at home
I sighed
I returned home
She apologized to me
the wrong address to the taxi driver
came to the conclusion that
an 'n'
everything ended happily
I will remember this story forever
.
_________________
Native English teacher at Mister Micawber's

[Zaaneetka]

thanks :)