TOEFL® Essay Samples: Some people spend their entire lives in one place

[Nomader]

Hi everyone.

I wrote this essay but I don't know if there's any mistakes in it. Can anyone help me?

Some people spend their entire lives in one place. Others move a number of times throughout their lives, looking for a better job, house, community, or even climate. Which do you prefer: staying in one place or moving in search of another place?

Use reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Moving around is better than settle. Moving to better places helps people see more about the world, brings new challenges and find best place to live.

When people move to different places, they will open their eyes. They may eat different food, learn different dialect or dress different costume. Moreover, they may have a better understanding of their situation. For example, people in rural areas make an unstable living on growing and selling crops, which can be affected by flood or drought. They are little educated and have little connection with the outside world. They may think that this is the best life they have. But when they go to the city, they see a totally different world: streets filled with shopping malls, restaurants, hotels, automobiles and companies. Most urban citizens are well-educated and have stable living. Some rural people realize that living in city is better life and they will try to achieve that goal. This is because seeing outside motivates people to climb to a higher spot.

When people move to new places, they have to face challenges. But dealing with challenges matures an individual. When I went to America I faced a lot of challenges, and one of them is language. I never learned English before so I couldn’t understand what others say. It was embarrassing at first because I had to communicate by using gestures. But I was not frustrated by this. I just tried to remember the meaning of each word they said. After several months, I had great improvement. I should say that facing this challenge and eventually solving it made me easier to communicate with Americans.

Sometimes people move around to find a better place to live. They may want to live in a city with better climate, better environment, have more job opportunities or simply to begin a new life. So they will leave their hometown and travel to another place. They may stay permanently in new place or move again to find an even better place. Many aging people choose to live in warm areas and by the ocean because it is good for their health. Many tourists compared my city to other cities. The thought the climate in my city was great and they liked to settle here in the future. So when people move around and see different places, they compare these places and may select the best place to settle.

In conclusion, moving around allows people to see more, to cope with challenges and may eventually settle down in the appropriate place. But when they stay in one place, it’s like “a frog in the bottom of well”.