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Please evaluate my English and advise how to improve my writing



 
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ESL Forum | What do you want to talk about?
meaning of Truism | Rights of fathers
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Please evaluate my English and advise how to improve my writing Wed Jan 02, 2008 1:59 am  Please evaluate my English and advise how to improve my writing
 

We started to temple around 12:30 PM today and reached there at 1:30 PM. We couldn't park our car due to huge crowd in temple as so many cars were parked around the temple. We went around the temple twice to get a parking spot but we couldn't park near the temple. So we came out of that place went to next block. We waited there around 10 mins and finally we got a space for parking our car. We spent almost 2 hours before we go into the temple. We had good darshan in perumal and sivan temple after that. After darshan, we went to canteen for buying food for lunch. We bought some food and started eating those foods immediately due to heavy hunger. One of our friend, Mukilan took around 45 mins to complete his lunch and it turned me off. After lunch, we settled in the car and drove towards home. Because of slight head-ache we went to Starbucks to have a hot coffee. We had a little chat in starbucks and drank couple of coffees. After shooting some photos, we came to our house around 5:30 PM. So, its almost 5 hours we spent today to go back and forth to temple. I had a little nap after reaching home and wake up only at 6 PM. I turned on the heater after that and started studying grammar book. I thought of going to gym after an hours of study. I got a call from Mukilan by that time and so am sitting and writing this little para for him to very my language. Even though Mukulan is very good in Maths, he is so reluctant in writing few words in English. This is the problem I faced with most of my friends and so I never got good company for improving my English. Infact, I joined few centers to improve my spoken English in chennai but I never got good grasp of English from any institute. I guess because of huge population in India, the quality of Education or focus towards a single candidate is very less.
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Request for reply... Thu Jan 03, 2008 5:40 am  Request for reply...
 

Hi Alem,

Please reply me...

Thanks,
Mangal
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Please evaluate my English and advise how to improve my writing Fri Jan 04, 2008 14:32 pm  Please evaluate my English and advise how to improve my writing
 

Hi,

My suggestions are in capital letters:

We started/SET OUT FOR THE temple around 12:30 PM today and reached there at 1:30 PM. We couldn't park our car AS THERE WAS A huge crowd in THE temple as so many cars were parked around the temple. We went around the temple twice to get a parking spot but we couldn't park near the temple. So we LEFT that place AND went to THE next block. We waited there around 10 minUTEs and finally we FOUND a PARKING space . We spent almost 2 hours before we goT into the temple. We had A good LOOK AT Darshan in Perumal and Sivan temple after that. After Darshan, we went to THE canteen TO BUY food for lunch. We bought some food and started eating thE FOOD immediately BECAUSE WE WERE VERY HUNGRY. One of our friendS, Mukilan took around 45 minUTES TO FINISH his lunch and it turned me off/AND IT ANNOYED ME?. After lunch, we settled in the car and drove towards home. Because of A slight head-ache we went to Starbucks to have a hot coffee. We had a little chat in Starbucks and drank A couple of coffees. After TAKING some photos, we came to our house around 5:30 PM. So, FOR almost 5 hours we spent THE day GOING back and forth to THE temple. I had a little nap after reaching home and wOke up only at 6 PM. I turned on the heater after that and started studying A grammar book. I thought of going to THE gym after an hour's study. I got a call from Mukilan by that time and so I am sitting and writing this little para for him to IMPROVE? my language. Even though Mukulan is very good in Maths, he is VERY reluctant TO WRITE A few words in English. This is the problem I face with most of my friends and so I HAVE never got good company TO IMPROVE my English. In fact, I HAVE joined A few centers to improve my spoken English in Chennai but I never gEt A good grasp of English from any institute. I guess because of THE huge population in India, the quality of Education or focus towards a single candidate is very SMALL.

Alan
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Thanks a lot... Fri Jan 04, 2008 14:46 pm  Thanks a lot...
 

Thanks a lot Alan! Happy New Year 2008!
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Joined: 23 Jun 2006
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Location: Chennai, India

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