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Can you proofread/amend this translation, please?



 
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Can you proofread/amend this translation, please? #1 (permalink) Fri Oct 03, 2008 10:04 am   Can you proofread/amend this translation, please?
 

Hi,

It would be great if anyone of you could proofread/amend the following draft of a translation I've done. If it helps, I can also post the original German text. Many thanks! Torsten

The Education Center stands for high competency consulting, support, professional development and progress through quality beyond the national borders.

As a modern company the Education Center is constantly facing new trends. New challenges require new solutions.

Since the company was founded a network of international partnerships. Here, education experts exchange experiences on current developments, trends and product information in order to develop innovative ideas.

To help small and medium sized businesses keep abreast of the dynamic of knowledge, the Education Center developed the project EvoLearn with the support of the European Union.

The Internet based system provides the user with information about different products in a timely and structured fashion.

EvoLearn enhances key competencies of trained staff in the retail sales industry and improves the quality of the sales talks.

The aim: To increase the performance and competitiveness of small and medium sized companies Europe wide.

In cooperation with ten European partners from eight countries a user friendly e-learning system was created.

Over a period of 26 months international professionals held meetings in locations throughout Europe such as here in the Norvegian city of Stavanger.

Already during the development process of EvoLearn, the system was tested in practice for example at the University of Kaunas.

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Torsten
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Torsten Daerr

Joined: 25 Sep 2003
Posts: 14503
Location: EU

Can you proofread/amend this translation, please? #2 (permalink) Fri Oct 03, 2008 18:52 pm   Can you proofread/amend this translation, please?
 

Torsten wrote:
Hi,

It would be great if anyone of you could proofread/amend the following draft of a translation I've done. If it helps, I can also post the original German text. Many thanks! Torsten

The Education Center stands for high competency consulting, support, professional development and progress through quality beyond the national borders.

As a modern company the Education Center is constantly facing new trends. New challenges require new solutions.

Since the company was founded a network of international partnerships. This sentence fragment doesn't make sense.

Here, education experts exchange experiences on current developments, trends and product information in order to develop innovative ideas.

To help small and medium sized businesses keep abreast of the dynamic of knowledge, the Education Center developed the project EvoLearn with the support of the European Union.

The Internet based system provides the user with information about different products in a timely and structured fashion.

EvoLearn enhances key competencies of trained staff in the retail sales industry and improves the quality of the sales talks.

The aim: To increase the performance and competitiveness of small and medium sized companies Europe wide. I understand the meaning, based off of 'worldwide', but I'd still change this to something like 'across Europe' or 'throughout Europe'

In cooperation with ten European partners from eight countries a user friendly e-learning system was created.

Over a period of 26 months international professionals held meetings in locations throughout Europe, such as here in the Norwegian city of Stavanger.

Already during the development process of NovoLearn, the system was tested in practice for example at the University of Kaunas. I think this is a bit awkward. Consider rearranging to something like:

'The NovoLearn system has already been tested in practice at the University of Kaunas, during the development process.'
or
'During development of Evolearn, the system was tested in practice at the University of Kaunas.'


Hi Torsten,

Most of it sounds good to me. I've indicated a few spots I felt needed some work.
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Can you proofread/amend this translation, please? #3 (permalink) Sat Oct 04, 2008 10:34 am   Can you proofread/amend this translation, please?
 

Good morning Skrej. Many thanks for your great support!

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Torsten
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Torsten Daerr

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Posts: 14503
Location: EU

Can you proofread/amend this translation, please? #4 (permalink) Sun Oct 05, 2008 11:00 am   Can you proofread/amend this translation, please?
 

Hi Skrej,

I've made the changes you suggested and this is what the text reads now:

The Education Centre stands for high competency consulting, support, professional development and progress through quality beyond the national borders. As a modern company the Education Centre is constantly facing new trends. New challenges require new solutions.

Since the company was founded a network of international partnerships has been created. Here, education experts exchange experiences on current developments, trends and product information in order to develop innovative ideas.

To help small and medium sized businesses keep abreast of the dynamic of knowledge, the Education Centre developed the project EvoLearn with the support of the European Union. The Internet based system provides the user with information about different products in a timely and structured fashion.

EvoLearn enhances key competencies of trained staff in the retail sales industry and improves the quality of the sales talks. The aim: To increase the performance and competitiveness of small and medium sized companies across Europe wide. In cooperation with ten European partners from eight countries a user friendly e-learning system was created.

Over a period of 26 months international professionals held meetings in locations throughout Europe such as here in the Norwegian city of Stavanger.

The EvoLearn system has already been tested in practice at the University of Kaunas, during the development process.

TOEIC listening, photographs: A happy family
Torsten
Learning Coach
Torsten Daerr

Joined: 25 Sep 2003
Posts: 14503
Location: EU

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