TOEFL® essay: Not everything is learned is contained in books

[Jsrijkc]

please correct this essay. Thanks in advance....

It has been said, “Not everything is learned is contained in books.” Compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from books. In your opinion, which source is more important? Why? Use specific examples and reasons to support your answer.

I feel that the question is asking me to say which eye I like most. I mean that it is difficult to say whether books are important or experience is important. I would rather explain that both are equally important. The knowledge gained from books as well as experience is required for advancement in life.
In the early stages of life the mind is not well developed to understand the circumstances. When a child falls down while walking, he would stand up and try again the same thing. In this situation if we say use the knowledge of experience, the child should never try to walk again. At such early stages, the knowledge obtained from books would be helpful in developing the child. The knowledge from books would form the basis for his development.
After certain stage of life, when people can understand what is good and what is bad, experience comes into scenario. The saying, “Experience makes man perfect” exactly fits to this situation. With experience people would gain knowledge which would help them predict the consequences and take measures to handle the outcomes. For example if a theory says decreasing the prices would attract people, one can’t apply the theory continuously even if it fails. In this situation experience would help that person come out with some other way such as changing the design of the product which would attract more number of people.
To conclude, I would like to mention that both the knowledge from experience and the knowledge form books would help a person progress through his life smoothly. The knowledge obtained from books forms the foundation on which a perfect house can be build with the knowledge of experience.

[Happytofita]

[Jsrijkc]

Hi

Thanks for correcting my essay.

Nice comments. I will try to improve my writing.

I didn't understand one thing. Should we not support both of them when a question is asked for one important thing?

I have just started practicing for the essays.

Thanks again

[Jsrijkc]

Hi Happytofita

Can u please tell me about my organization, use of words and other fundamental requirements about the essay I have written.

I want to improve it as much as possible.

Thank you so much.