TOEFL® essay: What should our government do to improve people’s health?

[Darkangel12891]

Topic:
what should our government do to improve people’s health?
Our government only well developed only if people’s healths are cared considerably. So what the government should do is to step up public constructions in order to improve the resident’s life such as park, public WC… Besides, they should enforce a law of tax declination and raise people’s salary. Otherwise, with the price rising, people face many difficult things as their salary is stabilizing. This is resulted to people won’t take care much about their health as they just go to pharmacy store and buy uncontrolled medicine, which will make their health weaker. Furthermore, the government should punish people who don’t obey safety cooking regulations. For illustration, in order to get more profits, some people use bad quality or over-expiry date selling to costumers that seriously affect people’s health. The last but not least, government should build more public hospital to reduce treatment fee so that it’s much cheaper than private hospital. This will availably help poor people to achieve better care by society.

[Gray]

Hey Tri,

Here is how I rearranged the words (see the bold ones):

Our government only well developed only if people’s healths are cared considerably.

Health care is one of the most important state responsibilities. There are many things which government could do to improve the health of the common man.

So what the government should do is to step up public constructions in order to improve the resident’s life such as park, public WC…

What is needed in the crowded city today is the pollution free open place or oxygen zone. This is achievable only through the strong determination by government to support and promote awareness about clean environment.

Besides, they should enforce a law of tax declination and raise people’s salary. Otherwise, with the price rising, people face many difficult things as their salary is stabilizing. This is resulted to people won’t take care much about their health as they just go to pharmacy store and buy uncontrolled medicine, which will make their health weaker.

As far as affordability is concerned, government should not leave any stone uncornered in reducing taxes on medicines, health clubs, health professionals and health services. At the same time, increasing taxes on addictives like cigarettes or banning them entirely or at least in public places goes a long way to ensure the public health.

Furthermore, the government should punish people who don’t obey safety cooking regulations. For illustration, in order to get more profits, some people use bad quality or over-expiry date selling to costumers that seriously affect people’s health.

Absence of strict implementation of law has always been a blockage in preventing the infectious food and medicines.

The last but not least, government should build more public hospital to reduce treatment fee so that it’s much cheaper than private hospital. This will availably help poor people to achieve better care by society.

Also, public hospitals today need a total revamp, in both quantity and quality. Finally, integrating health awareness in school curriculum has lots to offer in long the term.
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First lesson - English, not english. I, not i. ~A student of English

[Jordania]

I am not very good to write about this kind of topics, but I have to learn since there is an important part of TOEFL. I will wellcome any suggest, correction or anything.

What should our government do to improve people’s health?

My country has many other problems that are worrying much more than health like insecurity, drug traffic, et cetera. Presidents have put special attention to Health, so the problem is not as bad as in other fields. Although government has been careful with Healt, there are some points that they have forgotten. One of the problems is that public hospitals sometimes are attended by people who does not have vocation to their carriers, so they work poorly and do not take into account about the time of the patients. Other problem is that hospitals do no count with good installations to offer a service of quality. Hospitals are not present in communities that are far from cities and the cost of some public hospitals is expensive for these persons when they come to the city to take the service. There are many tents in inappropiate installations offering food on the streets. For example, there are some old vehicles who dispatch food in the avenues, streets and there is a lot of bacterias.

The worst problem that I have experienced is that sometimes you feel ignored when you go to a public hospital. The nurses and doctors sometimes are indifferent to the disease they see or your questions. They attend people so quickly and not very happy. Maybe government should put punishments for the people that do not do their work like must be.

Government should improve the installations of many public hospitals to offer a sevice of quality to all the persons. Also government should be careful with persons with scarce sources who come to city to receive health attention.

One of the worst problems of the persons that sell food on the streets is the hygienic that they do not have. Government should urge these persons to improve their hygienic in order to avoid many disease, and if they do not attend the advice they should be removed. Disease are costly for the government, so health is benefical for all.

I know that the things are changing in my country, but there is a lot to do about this topic of Health. Almost all problems in my country are related with graft because authorities in government see the problem exist but they do not do nothing. This means that something ocult is happening, so they try to not see what is obvios for everybody. Government should put serious punishment for the people that have attentives against the health of all citizens.

[Almazonly]

I am also not good at any TOEFL topic. It is my first step, I'm a kinda freshman @ this field. So here it goes.

What should our government do to improve people's health ???

Nowadays a lot of people worldwide get into troubles in the wake of the global economic crisis. The problems they face include a huge amount of aspects as diverse as a lack of food, stress, caused by losing their jobs and the non-ability to pay their mortgage and car credits, undernutrition induced by the wage cut and reduction of living standarts. The situation in health care is in a sad state and deplorable for a future generation. It can not be solved without directly governmental interference and vital support alike. The outbreak of disastrous diseases such as AIDS, tuberculosis, anemia and flu show as how desperatly we need a change and support in health care from the government.

First of all, in my opinion, in order to improve health care that is under a cloud, government should pay closer attention to the reduction of the health care costs. It is so high today as a lot of people who are under poverty conditions can not afford it. Second of all, everyone should have access to affordable health care. For example, in our country there are a great deal of people living in far-flung inhabited villages, who still eke out a wretched existence by farming sugar cane and sweet potatoes from poor, rocky and contaminated soil. As a result they are facing health problems and poverty. These regions should be provided by patient medicine examinations and hospitals working there on continuing basis for free.

If the government is anxious about the health of its citizens and choose new direction in health care policy, those bad health circumstances mentioned above will be changed for sure.

In conclusion, I would like to say that no one is useless in the world who lightens the burden of anothers and government plays a vital important role in resolving the health care problems in the country. We should take into account that the events happening in the world have an impact to you as well. When we are watching "Planet in Peril" on CNN, for instance, and observing four horsemen of the Apokalypse that are pestilence, war, famine and death, we never think about a fact, that every 3.6 seconds a person dies of hunger worldwide, we laugh when we hear the influence of climate change on the health of the population. And here comes the point, we should develop our horizone, because all aspects of ecosystem has an influence on our own lives. As far as government aware about its citizens, we might play a small part in building a better world.