TOEFL® speaking section: How birthdays are celebrated in your country?

[BlackStar]

Explain how birthdays are celebrated in your country. Use specific examples and details in your explanation.

In my country, birthdays are celebrated every year but the most important birthday is a jubilee. In contrast to usual birthday celebrating, it is more interesting and more important to participate in this party. This could be celebrated at home or in a restaurant. The person wears a strong white dress with accurately brushed hair. There are a lot of people, surrounding the person celebrating his name day, give various presents and wishes. Then the family members invite guests to celebrate the birthday. And there is music and dancing and food. Traditionally, only relatives and close friends stay until late at night, sometimes even until the morning, but many more people leave the party earlier.

Please check it. And say me, what could i add also here ??

[Happytofita]

[BlackStar]

Thank you for your attention. I know that it is more important how i say this. But logical correlation is most important for me. That's why i have posted here.

Could anybody check this small essay?

[Happytofita]

[BlackStar]

Happytofita, could you check my paragraph?

[Krrish1192]

Thanks for essay
I also wondering about this topic in speaking.
But i think it general topic.
Please give me guidence about it