Story: I am a handicapped and unemployed person. I can't go far outside my house.

[Amit1975]

Please give some feedback on my story and english.

Thanks in advance.

My Story

I am a handicapped and unemployed person. I can’t go far outside my house. I am very weak in English. I can’t babble much. I like friends and friendships. I don’t like foes. I love good personality persons. I love to listen to good music. I love to watch movies.

I can’t able to write well. I am trying hard to write whatever I know. I know that everyone can’t write well, but I am only trying.

There is a saying “if you try, you may succeed”. So, I am only trying.

I am the second child of my mother, while the oldest is forty-one years old.

My father is a retired officer, with whom I am dependent on for my living.

In my childhood, I had been affected by polio. The disease had destroyed my whole body. I walked by the help of calipers and a stick.

I was admitted to an English medium school, but I was not a good student.

I can’t able to remember my studies. My memory was very weak. I didn’t know why!

[Kitosdad]

Amit, I think you are a great student of English. If you have any problems with your story at all, it is that you are using " I " too often. Try to get your sentences to merge with each other, whilst maintaining the flow of the story.

However, it was VERY good.

Kitosdad.
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Hello everyone, my name is Amit. I am a handicapped person, so I don't often go far from my home.

My English is not very good, as I don't often get the opportunity to speak to many people in English, but I do like to strike up friendships .Mostly I like people with nice friendly personalities. Listening to good music and watching movies are my favourite pastimes..

Writing poses the greatest problem for me, but I really do try my best.

There is a saying “ if you try, you may succeed”. So, I am trying my very best.

My mother has two children. Myself being the youngest, while the oldest is forty-one years old.

My father is a retired officer, on whom I am dependent for my living.

In my childhood, I was badly affected by polio. The disease has destroyed my whole body. I walk now with the help of callipers and a stick.

Earlier in my life I was admitted to an English medium school, but I was not a good student.

I don't seem to be able to remember my studies. My memory seems very weak. I don't know why!
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Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Nejla]

Hi Amit.In my oppionion you are good at using english.And you are right if you try,you will be successful.Good luck:-)

[Joao Fonseca]

Hello dear friend, this is Joao Fonseca from Brazil, your story is nice, I have heard and seen lots of people and I do have some friend with the same living as you do. I guess I can undestand. whoever is out of the situation as you are sounds more confortable, but for me it is like no respect. so I am not going to ask about the way you live, you already wrote that. but I will write to you as a human been like I do to others. try to keep in good faith. If you want to pracice your english writing in me you hav someone to write about. so let´s keep in touch. I live in Brasilia the capital of Brazil, and where are you from? write a bit abou you.
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Joao Mª H. Fonseca
Your last mistake is your best teacher.