TOEFL® essay: Government should ensure the healthy lifestyle of people, but...

[Cypress]

Some people think government should ensure the healthy lifestyle of people, but others argue that it should be decided by individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Healthy lifestyle is one of the most popular topics among urbanites. In this circumstance, government should hold the responsibility to encourage people to enjoy healthy lifestyle, not only because individuals could be gullible to confront healthy issues, but also as a high quality of physical conditions of citizens can stimulate economy.

Firstly, there are some arguments that governments may not be involved in personal healthy issues .However, as not everyone has enough knowledge and qualification on the aspect of health, they may just follow advertisings or unreliable consultants, which, inversely, could increase the potential risk of unhealthy lifestyle, since the inappropriate guidance from advertisings or consultants. Therefore, government should formulate policies to guide citizens to establish healthy lifestyles.

Secondly, with widespread healthy lifestyles, economy has more opportunities to achieve prosperity. With healthy body conditions, labors work more efficiently, elders suffer less diseases and children are promised better development, hence manufactures can produce more, the budget of social insurance and superannuation can be cut and healthy young generations will provide stability to the growth of economy.

Last but not least, as individuals may have different body conditions which mean that governments should be less effective to consider every situation. Whereas, government should enhance infrastructure and use legislation to support the construction of healthy lifestyles instead of covering all the details
To conclude, governments should support healthy lifestyles both for the benefits of individuals and overall economy.

please assess my essay.Thank you

TOEFL listening discussions: A stereotypical toy means?

[Kitosdad]

may not be involved in ?

should not be involved in, or may not be interested in. Not sure of what you mean.

A few typos, a few half words, a few wrong words and a little repetitive, but well worth an eight.

Well written essay.
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Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.