TOEFL® essay: About culture

[Sueli]

"Feijoada"

It is saying that in earlies sixteenth century, when African slaves arrived in Brazil, to work on sugar and coffee plantation, their food was based in cereal like corn and bean, flavored with a variety of seasonings, coming from Africa. Any kind of more substantial food like meat,was forbidden to the slaves. The nobel parts of swine meat was served to their master and the remaining portions like ears, foots,and tails was rejected by them , wich were not suitable for their taste. The housekeeper slaves seeing in the meat leftovers an opportuniy to eat some kind of meat, used to take it to the “senzala” , as it was called where they lived , and added it to their stewed beans. As a result they got a fat food that gave them enough energy so necessary for their hard work on the crops. With the end of slavery, the "Feijoada", invented by slaves, had conquered all social classes and today has been included in the menu of very expensive Brasilian restaurants. This is the most popular explanation about the origin of the most known national dish of Brasilian cookery. But according to some historian this is an noveled explanation of a contemporary popular culture. They say that the national dish “Feijoada” is the result of a mixture of receipts brought here for people from different countries and the creativity of African slaves. Anyway, our national dish is made cooking, preferably in a cauldron, black beans , dried meat, ear, tail and foot of pig, sausage, pork chops and bacon, seasoned with onions, garlic, spring onion and pepper. It is served with flour, having as side order orange salad and spring greens, cut in very thin strips and slightly fried in butter and garlic. It is a very heavy dish and it is served at noom, acompanied by “caipirinha”, a mixture of lime juice, sugar, lots of crushed ice and “cachaça”, a strong liquor derived by sugar canne. It is very good. Come and try it.

Enjoy your meal!

I want to say that it is not an essay for Toefl Test. I am here only to improve my English. I would like to know if my ideas are clear and understandable.
Please do not judge the merit of subject.


If some teacher could correct it, I would be grateful.

Sueli

[Kitosdad]

Good morning Sueli, I enjoyed reading this brief story. It was very well written, with only a few errors.

I am not a teacher, but I will be more than happy to make some slight corrections should one of our teachers not have done so by later in the day.

Very interesting and entertaining. Thank you for writing it.

Kitosdad.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Kitosdad]

It is said that in the early sixteenth century, when African slaves arrived in Brazil to work on the sugar and coffee plantations, their food was based on cereals like corn and beans, flavoured with a variety of seasonings, coming from Africa. Any kind of more substantial food like meat,was forbidden to the slaves. The better parts of the pig was served to their master and the remaining portions like ears, [color=red]feet ,and tails was rejected by them , as not being suitable to their taste. The housekeeper ,seeing in the meat leftovers an opportunity to eat some kind of meat, used to take it to the “senzala” as it was called, where they lived , and they added it to their stewed beans. As a result they got a fatty food that gave them enough energy so necessary for their hard work on the crops. With the end of slavery, the "Feijoada", invented by slaves, had conquered all social classes, and today has been included in the menu of very expensive Brazilian restaurants. This is the most popular explanation about the origin of the most known national dish of Brazilian cookery. But according to some historians this is a noveled explanation of a contemporary popular culture. They say that the national dish “Feijoada” is the result of a mixture of recipies brought here for people from different countries and the creativity of African slaves. Anyway, our national dish is made by cooking, preferably in a cauldron, black beans , dried meat, ear, tail and foot of pig, sausage, pork chops and bacon, seasoned with onions, garlic, spring onion and pepper. It is served with flour, having as a side order orange salad and spring greens, cut into very thin strips and slightly fried in butter and garlic. It is a very heavy dish and it is served at noon accompanied by “caipirinha”, a mixture of lime juice, sugar, lots of crushed ice and “cachaça”, a strong liquor derived from sugar cane. It is very good. Come and try it.

Enjoy your meal!

I want to say that it is not an essay for Toefl Test. I am here only to improve my English. I would like to know if my ideas are clear and understandable.
Please do not judge the merit of subject.


If some teacher could correct it, I would be grateful.

Sueli, items underlined are not required. I hope you are happy with what I have done, and feel that it is a slight improvement. Kitosdad.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Sueli]

Dear Kitosdad

I am glad you have spent your time reading and correcting my essay. It is important to all those that are trying to learn English like me, to have someone willing to correct our mistakes. I confess, I was a little afraid of your answer before I had sent my writings. Now I see that some mistakes I have made were lack of attention.
Others , were interference of my mother language ( mothers always are blamed) I should have thought in English, not in Portuguese. Summarizing, I have to study much more.

Thanks for your attention

Sueli

[Kitosdad]

Sueli, "Others , were interference of my mother language ". That is a very significant point that you make there. You are absolutely correct of course, for years of your education cannot be overwritten as easily as switching on a lamp. The whole structure of English is completely different to your own and you all do remarkably well to reach such a high standard. Well done.

Give my regards to your dear Mother.

Kitosdad.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.