TOEFL® essay samples: What is the best age to marry?

[Gurramrashmi]

Please review my essay.

What is the best age to marry? Give reasons and examples to support your response.

In my views, the best age to get married for girl is twenty one and for boy is twenty six. There are many reasons for this. These are as follows.

The boys and girls who get married at their right age, they feel happy and confident. While, others who do not get married at their right age, they get frustrated. They think life is not joyful. They need someone to share their feelings. I have seen many people in my surrounding, who did not get married at their right age, and they are facing many problems in their life. People who do late marriage, these couples sexually not feel good. We can say they do not enjoy much more their sex life. While, young couple have more enthu towards their sex life. Those girls who get late married, they face problems to conceive baby. We can also say they may not conceive baby. Medical science also says there is the age to conceive baby for women. One of my friends is facing this problem. The reason for this is late marriage.

Some people think, first they succeed in their career after that they will do marriage. In this situation sometimes nobody wants to get married with his or her. In my opinion, both things are necessary to be done at the right time. Those people who do not get married at their right age, they do not want to adjust themselves according to their partner. In this case, chance of divorce is more. The new generation, which comes from the couple who get late married, is not as intelligent as the new generation which comes from the couple who get married at their age. Hence not only for the country sake but for the sake of world progress, people will have to get married at their right age.

In the nut shell, I would say every body try to get married at his or her right age.

[Kitosdad]

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Good evening Gurramrashmi. I don't know where to begin with an assessment of your essay. Your English is very good, as is your grammar and sentence structure. The problem rests in your inability to express yourself in a recognisable English manner.

You are trying to make some very valid points, but they are not registering with the English mind. This is certainly down to your native-tongue manner of writing out text.
To edit this essay would be a nightmare, and I'd probably destroy all of your confidence in the process.

If you really wish someone to edit this, then I will gladly do so, but please be aware that it will be unrecognisable as your finished work. Please let me know how you feel about this.

Kitosdad.
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Keep it simple. Keep it interesting.

[Gurramrashmi]

Hi Kitosdad
Please correct my essay. I would really thankful to you. I know it is a tough job to correct my essay. My English is not good.
Rashmi

[Kitosdad]

In my opinion the best ages for couples to marry is that the woman should be several years younger than the man.

The couples who get married at compatible ages feel happy and confident, while others who do not do so become frustrated. They feel that their lives are not fulfilling. The female needs someone to share her feelings with and young men are not orientated to do this very well. It has been often said that a woman is several years " older " than a man of the same age, and therefore she is better mentally suited to marry an older partner. I see many people in my daily life who did not get married at their right ages, and they are facing many problems in their lives.

People who marry very late in life usually don't have a very satisfying sex life. We can say they do not have the same interest in sex as they did in their younger years,while those who marry young have much more enthusiasm towards their sex life, indeed, the whole marriage may be based on the sexual compatibility alone. Women who get married late in life often face problems in conceiving a child, indeed, they may find that they have left this decision far too late for conception.

Some people think that they should first have a successful career before considering marriage. Sometimes this personal opinion can lead to a person never ever getting married.

In my opinion, both things are necessary to be done at the right time. Those people who make the decision not get married at their right ages do so because they do not want to adjust themselves to the commitment of a partner, and the changes that marriage will inevitably make to their life. If this is truly the case, then the higher chance of divorce will be ever-present in their relationship.

In conclusion I would say that the possibility of a happy, stable marriage between young couples of the same age and older couples, whatever the age difference, are fraught with problems. The younger couple will base their marriage around sex, and the older couple will, in all probability, find it difficult to alter the habits of many years of being alone and single.

Get the " age equation" right and all things will be possible. Get it wrong and you face a very rocky road ahead.

Good morning Gurramrashmi, I have tried to retain your opinions as much as possible, but it wasn't too easy.
_________________
Keep it simple. Keep it interesting.

[Gurramrashmi]

Hi Kitosdad
I really appreciate your efforts. Thank a lot.
Rashmi

[Kitosdad]

Any-time my friend, any-time.

Kitos.
_________________
Keep it simple. Keep it interesting.