Hello everybody. My name is Mahesh. I am a dentist from India...

[Mahesh1]

my name is mahesh.i am a dentist from india.i have toefl on 27 june.so please help me to improve my writing skill.please grade my essay out of 5.i will really appreciate your answer.
topic.-which gift you would like to give to child to improve his development?

I think many gifts play a important role in the development of the child.If i have an opportunity to donate a gift to the child, i would prefer a set of chess.As for as development of the child is concerned,a chess will prove best for so many reasons.
first of all,it will help in the cognitive development of the child.A study conducted in 1974-1976 named "belgium study" had proved that there was an overall increase in the cognitive abilities of the child.this study was based on the piaget's cognitive theory of psychology.
second contribution of the chess in child development is, increase in the overall intelligency of the child.Another study that was conducted in 1994-1998 in texas named "texas study" concluded that there was increase in the reading and mathematical abilities of the the control group who played chess compare to the control group who didn't play a chess.
third advantage is increase the abilities of creativity ,logical thinking,problem solving and many other important abilities.other trivial advantage of chess is ,it can be played at any place and it doesn't require much space.If child tear down the chess board(as most common with the children) ,it will be easy to replace it with new one,it doesn't cost more and so called it's an economical gift.
Let's put two by two together now.Although,one cannot give assurance that having chess with the child will help in the development.there are many other environmental factors like nourishment,family members' attitudes and lots more play important role in the child development. but from the above survey one can say that the chess plays an important role in the development of the child.

[Kitosdad]

Good morning Mahesh1, your essay should be re-posted onto the essay thread. It has a far better chance of being seen there.

This is the thread for newcomer introductions only.

Kitosdad.
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If you need me, I'm here.

[Atiq]

It's good Mahesh but should be in essay from.

[Kai_Dono]

Hi!

[Rene882]

I think you should use capital letters when you start any period. The rest is ok with your test. I enjoyed reading it. Congratulations.

[Mahesh1]

thanks rene.
next time i will try my best.oh, i have posted another essay on toefl essay thread named ideal qualities of neighbor ...please review and give me suggestion if you have a time.I will really appreciate your answer..
thanks again.