Some people think that governments should spend as much as money as possible...

[Xixinh]

Some people think that governments should spend as much as money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Other people disagree and think that this money should be spent on more basic needs. Which one of these opinions do you agree with? Use specific and details to support your answers.

One of the major of government is to serve people, therefore, every decision effects directly to all citizens. Giving an amount of money, government should develop computer technology or spend this money on basic need. In my opinion, I support the latter because computer technology is not profitable, transportation need to improve and there are many people need helping from government.

When government develops computer-related, they need a huge investment at this moment and also its only use for long term planning. However, this plan brings more risks than normal because there are lots of computer-related company went bankrupt in the past. This means it is very easy to get nothing if government uses money to develop or buy computer technology. In the end, the promise of improving citizen life will not be able to complete.

Besides that, the transportation is going to falling apart and really need to improve. For example, the roads are worse and worse after long time existing, the bridges are also having cracks which are very easy to collapse and the public transportation means are not enough to serve the people living in the city. Therefore, the most important thing is that we need to invest to the basic need immediately.

In additional, there are more than two third of the poor living under the living standard, they really need supporting by the money of government. For example, the poor need food, water, clean water, health care, education which they haven’t been provided enough so far. Hence, we need to use the giving money for a better life of the poor instead of using this to developing computer.

In a short, computer technology is not a good choice for us to improve the life of people in the country. Government should concentrate on the basis need to pretend the risk, develop the transportation and help the poverties.

TOEFL listening lectures: Why do Birds of Paradise have amazing plumages?

[Kitosdad]

Some people think that governments should spend as much money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Other people disagree and think that this money should be spent on more basic needs. Which one of these opinions do you agree with? Use specific and details to support your answers.

One of the major (responsibilities) of (any) government is to serve (its) people. (T)herefore, every decision (it makes will have a direct effect on) all citizens.
Giv(en) an amount of money, should (they) develop computer technology, or spend this money on (more) basic need(s)?.

In my opinion, I support the latter because computer technology is not profitable.
(Public transport) need(s) to (be)improve(d) and there are many people (who)need help from (the) government.

When (the) government (decide to)develop computer-related (technology), they (will) need a huge investment at this moment, and also (to assess) its only use (with)long term planning.
However, this plan brings more risks than normal because there are lots of computer-related compan(ies) (who have gone) bankrupt in the past.
This means it is very easy to get nothing if government uses money to develop or buy computer technology.
In the end, the promise of improving citizen(s) life will not be able to (be)complete(d).

Besides that, the transportation is going to falling apart and really need(s) to (be)improve(d).
For example, the roads are (becoming) worse and worse after (having been) used for such a long time.
(T)he bridges are also having cracks which (could easily lead) to collapse, and the public transportation means (that there) are not enough (vehicles)to serve the people living in the city. Therefore, the most important thing is that we need to (attend) to the (peoples) basic need(s) immediately.

In additional, there are more than two third(s) of the poor living under the living standard. (T)hey really need supporting by the money of government.
For example, the poor need food, clean water, health care, (and) education which they haven’t been provided (with) so far. Hence, we need to use the giv(en) money for a better life of the poor instead of using this to develop computer(s).

In short, computer technology is not a good choice for us to improve the life of people in the country. Government should concentrate on the basi(c) need(s) of the people, (eradicate poverty) and (improve public transport standards.).

Not bad Xixinh, but you have a way to go yet.

Kitos.
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Xixinh]

Dear Kitos,

I have reviewed my essay as follows.
Hope that will be got high score by you. :P

Warmest regards,
Xixinh.
___

One of the major responsibilities of any government is to serve its people. Therefore, every decision, it makes will have a direct effect on all citizens. And, it is given an amount of money, should develop computer technology, or spend this money on more basic needs? In my opinion, I support the latter because computer technology is not profitable. Also, public transport needs to be improved and there are many people who need help from the government.

When the government decide to develop computer-related technology, they will need a huge investment at this moment, and also to assess its only use with long term planning. However, this plan brings more risks than normal because there are lots of computer-related companies which have gone bankrupt in the past. This means it is very easy to get nothing if government uses money to develop or buy computer technology. In the end, the promise of improving citizens life will not be able to be completed.

Besides that, the transportation is going to falling apart and really needs to be improved. For example, the roads are becoming worse and worse after having been used for such a long time. The bridges are also having cracks which could easily lead to collapse. The public transportation means that there are not enough vehicles to serve the people living in the city. Therefore, the most important thing is that we need to attend to the peoples basic needs immediately.

In additional, there are more than two thirds of the poor living under the living standard. They really need supporting by the money of government. For example, the poor need food, clean water, health care, and education which they haven’t been provided with so far. Hence, we need to use the given money for a better life of the poor instead of using this to develop computers.

In short, computer technology is not a good choice for us to improve the life of people in the country. Government should concentrate on the basic needs of the people, eradicate poverty and improve public transport standards.

[Kitosdad]

Good morning my young friend. My work is not perfect when judged against that of Alan or Mr. Micawber, but for a non-native speaker I'm fairly confident that your edited version will be better received that the earlier one.

You should be confident in obtaining a pass mark at least. Well done.

Don't relax though. There is still much work to be done.

:) :) Kitos.
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Husska]

nice

[Husska]

It sounds good what he says..

[Husska]

It sounds good what he says..

[Husska]

Can someone halp me to develop a good essay?

[Husska]

Some people think that governments should spend as much money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Other people disagree and think that this money should be spent on more basic needs. Which one of these opinions do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

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Some people think that governments should spend as much money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Other people disagree and think that this money should be spent on more basic needs. In today’s society there is an extensive usage of computer technologies. Computer technologies are now an integral part of our society; computers have become indispensible for the continued functioning of today’s society permeating every aspect of our lives. For more and more people a computer in the home has become a necessity. As will be seen, it is a necessity for governments to spend as much as possible on developing and buying computer technology especially as they tend to increase a companies or individuals productivity or efficiency.
The benefits of computer technology are numerous as many business organizations are using different types of application software to efficiently run their work and increase their productivity in the work place. Computer technologies are not only limited to businesses but they can also be used to support our children in their studies.
Computer technology has been so successful that it is now an integral part in medical fields and is considered to be very humanitarian and part of our basic survival needs in today’s society. Almost every medical instrument is made by a computer generated machine and all the advanced medical machines are controlled by computers. Doctors that used traditional and conventional methods that were more painful are now using more advanced techniques like MRI, CT scans and X-rays machines; all this was possible because of the advancing in computer fields. More diseases are now identified at earlier stages in patients and are cured with less pain. Even surgeries are performed with the help of machines using computer technology. As the usage of computers in the medical and pharmaceutical sciences increases, we can expect a healthier future.

Computer technology has also proven useful to us in cars as today we are getting high-tech cars built with various artificial intelligence components to improve their safety levels. For example Bluetooth technology helps us to attend calls while driving by receiving calls from in -built radio featuring Bluetooth technology. Computer technologies are also used in many other areas such as banks, space, aviation and transport.

Although some might argue that the government is turning a blind eye to more basic needs that could improve the basic needs of society, they neglect the fact that computer technology itself has become a basic need as people can no longer live without internet or mobile connections and demand at the same time more efficient service.

Therefore governments should spend as much money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Based on the above arguments it can be seen that computers have improved many aspects of our lives and via the use of modern computer technologies many of our basic needs have been made more accessible to us and allowed us to increase our national productivity and efficiency.

[Kitosdad]

In today’s society there is an extensive usage of computer technologies. Computer technologies are now an integral part of our society; computers have become indispensAble for the continued functioning of today’s society(,) permeating every aspect of our lives. For more and more people a computer in the home has become a necessity. As will be seen, it is a necessity for governments to spend as much as possible on developing and buying computer technology(,) especially as they /tend/HAVE PROVEN/ to increase a companies or individuals productivity or efficiency.
The benefits of computer technology are numerous(,) as many business organizations are using different types of application software to efficiently run their work and increase their productivity in the work place.
Computer technologY IS not only limited to businesses(.) but t IT can also be used to support our children in their studies.
Computer technology has been so successful that it is now an integral part in medical fields(,) and is considered to be A very humanitarian and part of our basic survival needs in today’s society.
Almost every medical instrument USED TODAY /is made /HAS BEEN DESIGNED/by a computer generated machine(,) and all the advanced medical machines are NOW controlled by computers.
Doctors /that/WHO ONCE used traditional and conventional methods that were more painful(,) are now using more advanced techniques like MRI, CT scans and X-RAY machines(.) All OF THESE WERE MADE possible BECAUSE of the ADVANCES in computer fields.
More TODAY diseases are now BEING identified at earlier stages in patients and are BEING cured with less pain BEING CAUSED TO THE SUFFERER.
Even surgeries are performed with the help of machines using computer technology.
As the usage of computers in the medical and pharmaceutical sciences increases, we can /expect/LOOK FORWARD TO/ a healthier future.

Computer technology has also proven useful to us in cars(,) as today we are /getting/HAVING/ high-tech cars /built/DESIGNED/with various artificial intelligence components to improve their safety levels.
For example(,) Bluetooth technology /helps/ALLOWS/ us to /attend/ACCEPT/ calls while driving by receiving calls from AN in -built radio featuring Bluetooth technology.
Computer technologies are also used in many other areas such as banks, space TRAVEL, aviation and transport.

Although s Some might argue that the government is turning a blind eye to more basic needs that could improve the basic needs of society, BUT they /neglect/OVERLOOK/CHOOSE TO IGNORE/ the fact that computer technology itself has become a basic need AND AN INDISPENSABLE ASSET(,) as people can no longer live without Internet or mobile PHONE connections(,) and demand at the same time /DEMAND/EXPECT/more efficient service.

Therefore governments should spend as much money as possible on developing or buying computer technology. Based on the above arguments it can be seen that computers have improved many aspects of our lives(,) and via the use of modern computer technologies(,) many of our basic needs have been made more accessible to us and allowed us to increase our national productivity and efficiency.
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Good morning Husska. An impressive essay.

Kitos. 9/10
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.