Classmates are a more important influence than parents on a child's success...

[Sung_Tung]

Topic 2:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Classmates are a more important influence than parents on a child's success in school.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

My essay:
I have lots of classmates who help me when I get problems; however I think parents are the most influence on a child’s success in school for some reasons below.

Children begin to learn from the time they are born. They learn reading, speaking, listening, communicating…all from their parents. And the care from parents makes a great impact on children’s learning. For example, if parents speak to kids, they can learn speaking and listening more quickly. Furthermore, home tutors makes children easily understand their lesson at school. A child who is taught by their parents before going to school can be more intelligent, agile and energetic than the others.

Secondly, parents have lots of experiences in their life to help children solve problems. A child may confide to their parents what they think and feel because they love their parents most. Also parents give them good directions. Classmates can also do that but sometimes they agree with the bad action because of lacking of experience.

Thirdly, parents always expect their children to be good students in school. They make their children to learn hard enough to get good marks. So if the children want to please their parents, they have to study hard enough. They will not go out without finishing their homework even though classmates come to invite them.

Children are brought up with care and love from their parents. Parents teach them, help them overcome difficulties and put their expectation on them. So parents are the most important influence on a child's success in school.

257 words

Can anyone check my essay and score it?

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation in a professor's office between a professor and a student

[Sung_Tung]

sorry, I have made a mistake. I post two topics which are the same.

[Kitosdad]

Excellent essay. Score? No idea.
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.