TOEFL® essay: Best age to get married

[Yamilet]

Best age to get married
Once again one of my first essays. Ay advice is greatly appreciated.
By the way I know is to long for the TOEFL

Long ago, people used to get married at a very early age. Sometimes by their own choices and others by force. The parents would choose the husbands or wives for their children . This is called arrange marriage which is still practiced in few countries around the world, like in the Middle East, and South Asia. But it is not as common any more because of all the changes in society. It is very hard to identify the best age to get married. However, my personal believe of when to get married is contradictory even to myself, since I got married at a very early age . When you get married young you have many opportunities, that you do not have when you get married at an older age and vice versa. But I can say will full certainty that the best age to get married is a choice made by each and every person and more importantly depending on his or her mature statues.

There are many advantages when you get married young. When I say young I mean on your 20s. For example, if your partner is the same age as yourself, you both can study together, mature together, grow together, and learn how to live and build your life. All of this may sound like a lot of fun for young people who thinks they know everything, but reality is quite different. They do however, have an open mind to every single thing that comes their way. But they are not old enough to have a good job, and be able to provide for the family. Education is the best tool to build the financial foundation for your marriage, and a healthy lifestyle. No matter how mature you are, or think you are there are many things that could be a problem. For instance, young people are very trusting, immature and not as responsible as an older person. Therefore, there are many things to be learned and experienced. Such as having kids.

This is a very important step that should be thought out, and carefully planned. They will need help, because it is very difficult to do it alone. Having kids complicates your life in way that no one knows unless you have them. Of course, that it also has its advantages, it is easier in some ways because you have more patience, and you will grow together with your child. Children are a blessing, that should never be question, but because of this is best to make sure you can actually be there for them support, and raise them with love, care, and respect. Once kids comes into your life, you will not have time for yourself, and sometimes not even for your partner. So a person should have their priorities well set in order to be successful at building a family. Once you are married your freedom will not be the same, and now you need to inform someone of all your plans. You can not just go on a holiday without telling your husband, or even go out with a group of friends in the middle of the night to have fun. This is where marriage starts, and the commitment to it. As well as the respect for your partner. Regardless of your age this will always be a major factor in marriages.

On the other hand, when you get married later in life; in your 30s, you have the advantages of have lived your life, enjoyed it and done all the things you wanted to experience, maybe travel, or simply not having to give any explanation to anyone of where you are, and when you are coming back. By the time you are 30 you are most likely to be more mature than others, more careful in the choices you make, and you would know what you want in a partner. You are probably a successful professional who can support yourself, and don't need to depend on anyone. Unfortunately, the older you are the less chances you have of getting pregnant and having kids. Not everyone has this bad experience, but you are at a higher risk. In addition, you will not have as much patience. As your kids get older so do you and time pass you by and you don't even know when. But marriage has the same characteristic for everyone regardless of their age. In my opinion, the most crucial characteristic of marriage is friendship. Which is the foundation for a long lasting relationship. Consequently love,Honesty, communication, loyalty, trust, sincerity, and so many more. They all play an equal role in marriage.

To sum up, marriage is a very important step that every single person takes in life. Something that should last forever, and that unfortunately does not. The divorce level is extremely high not only in Canada, but all over the world specially in the United States. Many people get married without being sure that this is the right thing to do, in some cases without even knowing that person for an acceptable period of time. Another factor that makes the divorce rate go up every year is that couples do not work their differences. Once there is a problem they get divorced rather than giving it another try. The number one victims in this cases are the children. As a result, that's when they start to present behavioral problems, and get bad grades at school. As you can see I can say that getting married at an early age has its advantages, and so does when getting married later in life. For this reasons is really hard to determine what is the right age that a person should get married. Exactly when are we grown up enough for marriage? And why does it seem to exist an ever-growing divide between men, and women over the most appropriate age for tying the knot? This is a question that will always be answered with a question mark. In my opinion it depends on each and everyone of us to decide when we are ready or not. Every case is different, and it is up to us to take the right steps in order to have a meaningful life.
_________________
Yamilet

[Sung_Tung]

too long, you should shorten your essay

[Sunshinegirl]

In my opinion it's nice but really too long.

[Kitosdad]

Good morning Yamilet.

In my opinion it is a wonderful essay that shows a maturity in thinking beyond your years.

If all couples were as forward thinking as yourself, then I'm sure that the divorce rate would plummet.

Your essays/postings are always good. My one personal dislike is the reference to children as "kids". Its use lowers the whole tone of the essay.

Kitos.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Kitosdad]

Long ago, people used to get married at a very early age. Sometimes by their own choices and others by force.

The parents would choose the husbands or wives for their children .
This is called (an) arrange(d) marriage which is still practiced in (a) few countries around the world, like in the Middle East, and South Asia. But it is not as common any more because of all (of) the changes in society's perception of this practice.)

It is(difficult) to identify the best age to get married.
However, my personal belie(f) (in) when to get married is contradictory even to myself, since I got married at a very early age .

When you get married young you have many opportunities, that you do not have when you get married at an older age and vice versa. But I can say (with) certainty that the best age to get married is a choice (best) made by each and every person, and more importantly, depending on his or her mature stat(us).

There are many advantages (in getting) married young.
When I say young I mean (in) your 20s.

For example, if your partner is the same age as yourself, you both can study together, mature together, grow together, and learn how to live and build your life.
All of this may sound like a lot of fun for young people who (think that) they know everything, but reality is quite different.
They do however, have an open mind to every single thing that comes their way. But they are not old enough to have a good job, and be able to provide for the family.

Education is the best (means of) build(ing) the financial foundation for your marriage, and a healthy lifestyle.
No matter how mature you are, or think you are, there are many things that could be a problem.
For instance, young people are very trusting, immature and not as responsible as an older person. Therefore, there are many things to be learned and experienced. Such as having (children).

This is a very important step that should be thought out, and carefully planned.
They will need help, because it is very difficult to do it alone.

Having (children) complicates your life in way that no one knows unless you have them. Of course, that also has its advantages, (as)it is easier in some ways because you have more patience, and you will grow together with your child.

Children are a blessing. (T)hat should never be question(ed), but because of this (it) is best to make sure you can actually be there (to) support (them), and raise them with love, care, and respect.

Once (children) (come) into your life, you will not have time for yourself, and sometimes not even for your partner.
So a person should have their priorities well set in order to be successful at (raising) a family.

Once you are married your freedom will not be the same, and now you need to inform someone of all your plans. You can not just go on a holiday without telling your husband, or even go out with a group of friends in the middle of the night to have fun. This is where marriage starts, and the commitment to it. As well as the respect for your partner. Regardless of your age this will always be a major factor in marriages.

On the other hand, when you get married later in life; in your 30s, you have the advantages of hav(ing) lived your life, enjoyed it, and (have) done all (of) the things you wanted to experience, maybe travel, or simply not having to give any explanation to anyone of where you are, and when you are coming back.

By the time you are 30 you are most likely to be more mature than others, more careful in the choices you make, and you would know what you want in a partner.
You are probably a successful professional who can support yourself, and don't need to depend on anyone. Unfortunately, the older you are the less chances you have of getting pregnant and having (children).

Not everyone has this bad experience, but you are at a higher risk (because of your age).
In addition, you will not have as much patience.

As your (children become) older so do you, and time pass you by and you don't even (notice it doing so).
But marriage has the same characteristic for everyone regardless of their age. In my opinion, the most crucial characteristic of marriage is friendship, (w)hich is the foundation for a long-lasting relationship.

Consequently love,(h)onesty, communication, loyalty, trust, sincerity, and so (much) more, all play an equal role in marriage.

To sum up, marriage is (the most) important step that every single person takes in life. Something that should last forever, and that unfortunately does not.
The divorce level is extremely high not only in Canada, but all over the world, (e)specially in the United States.

Many people get married without being sure that this is the right thing to do,in some cases without even knowing that person for an acceptable period of time.
Another factor that makes the divorce rate go up every year is that couples do not work (out) their differences.

Once there is a problem they get divorced rather than giving it another try.
The number one victims in th(ese) cases are the children.
As a result, that's when they start to present behavioural problems, and get bad grades at school.

As you can see I can say that getting married at an early age has its advantages, and so does when getting married later in life.
For this reasons (it) is really (difficult) to determine what is the right age that a person should get married.
Exactly when are we grown-up enough for marriage?
And why does (there) seem to exist an ever-growing divide between men, and women over the most appropriate age for tying the knot?

This is a question that will always be answered with a question mark.

In my opinion it depends on each and everyone of us to decide when we are ready or not. Every case is different, and it is up to us to take the right steps in order to have a meaningful (marriage).

Kitos.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Gray]

[Bkhan]

In my openion the best to get married is maturity, once a person gets mature he or she should get married as soon as possible. Because majority of the young generation falls into unethical and irreligious activities due to late marriages. As for as the reliability of arranged and love marriages is concerned, it dependend mostly upon situation and environment.

[Yamilet]

Thanks everyone for all the advices.
Kitos- Is there any other way I can refer to children other than kids?
Any suggestion on that?
_________________
Yamilet

[Kitosdad]

Children is the nicest sounding.

Youngsters could be used in a particular context, but children is always the best.

Only my opinion, but I would never call your, or anyone's children, kids.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Yamilet]

Is is to informal for writing?
in daily life we use it every day
I live in Canada, and here when someone refers to your children, say" how is your kid doing"
or "how are the kids?"
So this is why i have used it, but maybe it is too informal.
Thanks
_________________
Yamilet

[Salahkhaldi]

the best age depends on society. in islamic communities a woman may marry at 14 or 15.In europe a 15 year old girl is still unmature.