Google
English-Test.net
Find penpals and make new friends today!
 
personal peculiarity; mannerism; eccentricity
curb
accord
idiosyncrasy
banter
full quiz correct answer
 
Username
Password
 Remember me? 
Search   Album   FAQ   Memberlist   Profile   Private messages   Register   Log in 

Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagree?



 
TOEFL Practice tests Increase your TOEFL test score with
120 Vocabulary + 100 Grammar tests
600 TOEFL flashcards plus an ESL book
ESL Forums | Preparation for and help with the TOEFL® Test and essay samples collection
Where to learn a foreign language? | TOEFL® essay: The qualities of a good neighbor
listening exercisestell a friend
Message
Author
Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagree? #1 (permalink) Fri Sep 11, 2009 3:17 am   Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagree?
 

Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Employees should be required to provide smoking areas for their employees who smoke cigarettes.

Although smoking is harmful to health, a lot of people still in the habit of smoking cigarette. Not only smoking is harmful for the smoker, but also to the people around them. That is why this habit often annoyed those who are not smoking. Therefore for me, employers should not provide smoking areas for their employees for several reasons.

It is mandatory for the employers to protect the health of their employees and reduce the smoking-related cost such as high risk of fire damage related to smoking. Smoke-free workplace reduce significantly the amount of what they called second-hand tobacco smoke. This kind of policy actually encourages the employers who are smokers to quit smoking.

Another consideration is people who smoke take breaks during the working hour more often than those who are not. This reduces the productivity on-the-job. When employers have mandated policy for a smoke-free environment and even discourage to smoke in the premise of the building, this will keep the employees who are smokers to take break at the same time with other fellow employees only during lunch time.

The other reason is cost. In order to provide an ideal well-ventilated smoking area, employers will spend quite a sum of money, while this area will actually only serve the minority of the employers who are smokers. I think it is more profitable for the fund to be used for a smoking cessation program for the smokers instead. Cessation program is relatively low-cost and highly cost-effective.

After giving out the aforementioned considerations, I may conclude that employees should not be required to provide smoking areas for their employees because smoke-free environment have so many benefit such as creating saver environment in the workplace, improve worker’s health and also enhance the corporate image because nowadays there is a global trend toward safer, cleaner, environment.

TOEFL listening lectures: What makes 'The Canterbury Tales' easier to understand?
Quincy
New Member


Joined: 10 Sep 2009
Posts: 2

Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagr #2 (permalink) Fri Sep 11, 2009 9:52 am   Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagr
 

Hi.
Good essay! I enjoyed, however, I have some points:
Quincy wrote:
Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Employees should be required to provide smoking areas for their employees who smoke cigarettes.
Although smoking is harmful to health, a lot of people (ARE) still in the habit of smoking cigarette. Not only smoking is harmful for (TO) the smoker, but also to the people around them. That is why this habit often annoyed those who are not smoking. Therefore for me (from my point of view), (I BELIEVE THAT)employers should not provide smoking areas for their employees for several reasons.

It is mandatory for the employers to protect the health of their employees and reduce the smoking-related cost such as high risk of fire damage related to smoking. Smoke-free workplace reduce(S) significantly the amount of what they called second-hand tobacco smoke. This kind of policy actually encourages the employers who are smokers to quit smoking.

Another consideration is people who smoke take breaks during the working hour more often than those who are not (SMOKERS). This reduces the productivity on-the-job (reduces productivity on the job). When employers have mandated policy for a smoke-free environment and even discourage to smoke in the premise (ON THE PREMISES)-- of the building, this will keep the employees who are smokers to take break at the same time with other fellow employees only during lunch time.

The other reason is cost. In order to provide an ideal well-ventilated (AND NON-SMOKING) smoking area, employers will spend quite a sum of money, while this area will actually only serve the minority of the employers who are smokers. I think it is more profitable for the fund to be used for a smoking cessation program for the smokers instead. Cessation program is relatively low-cost and highly cost-effective.

After giving out the aforementioned considerations, I may conclude that employees should not be required to provide smoking areas for their employees because smoke-free (NON-SMOKING) environment have so many benefit such as creating saver (SAFER) environment in the workplace, improve worker’s health and also enhance the corporate image because nowadays there is a global trend toward safer,(AND) cleaner environment.

You have used a lot of COMPOUND ADJECTIVES (such as; well-ventilated, cost-effective, low-cost, smoke-free, and second-hand) with a high degree of accuracy and I liked it. nice! :)
and you're expected to study more about usage of "not only…but also" to use it more effective.
------------------------
Let me know whether you have any suggestions or you suppose that I'm wrong.
Good luck.
_________________
Global Marketing
Richard
I'm a Communicator ;-)


Joined: 01 Sep 2009
Posts: 1319
Location: Malaysia (at present)

TOEFL Prep Tests — Increase your Score with 120 free TOEFL Vocabulary TestsTOEFL Study Guide Guaranteed to Raise TOEFL scores without weeks and months of studying — View the Free ReportTOEFL Test Package — Learn the most difficult TOEFL vocabulary words you need to pass the TOEFL with these vocabulary tests and this unique flash card systemHow many different ways with words do you know? Subscribe to free email English course
Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagr #3 (permalink) Fri Sep 11, 2009 14:19 pm   Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagr
 

Quincy, I think you have your employees and employers mixed-up quite a lot in your essay.

Where are your facts to prove that smokers are in a minority in any place of work?

Your essay is acceptable only if it is not a figment of your imagination.

Quite a lot of errors in your text, but quite a good essay, all things considered.

Kitos.
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.
Kitosdad
Language Coach


Joined: 04 Mar 2009
Posts: 13417
Location: ESSEN, Germany, (but English.)

Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagr #4 (permalink) Fri Sep 11, 2009 18:43 pm   Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagr
 

Kitosdad wrote:
Quincy, I think you have your employees and employers mixed-up quite a lot in your essay.

Where are your facts to prove that smokers are in a minority in any place of work?


thanks ever so much for your help, I really appreciate it, Kitos.
I just skimmed it in haste, but you gave quite helpful points.
pretty Good.
Hope to be like you after awhile.
Good luck.
_________________
Global Marketing
Richard
I'm a Communicator ;-)


Joined: 01 Sep 2009
Posts: 1319
Location: Malaysia (at present)

Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagree? #5 (permalink) Fri Sep 11, 2009 23:04 pm   Essay: Employees should be required to provide smoking areas. Agree or disagree?
 

Hi guys,

Thanks for proof-reading the essay. Yes, you both are right, many typhos, huh?

:oops:

I was trying to type it fast enough to get it finished in 30 minutes. That's how I got the employees and employers mixed up. I have taken the TOEFL test today, so it seems this will be the first and last essay to be posted. Phew!! :D
Quincy
New Member


Joined: 10 Sep 2009
Posts: 2

Display posts from previous:   
Where to learn a foreign language? | TOEFL® essay: The qualities of a good neighbor
ESL Forums | Preparation for and help with the TOEFL® Test and essay samples collection All times are GMT + 1 Hour
Page 1 of 1
Latest topics on TOEFL Test Forums
Beauties of EnglishPeople succeed is because of their luck?TOEFL® speaking: Would you prefer to go on a long trip by car or by train?TOEFL® speaking: If you could visit any foreign country in the world for two weeksTOEFL® essay: Some students prefer to study alone.TOEFL® essay: Attending classes should be optional or mandatoryHuman activity related to EarthMany people have pets. Other people don't.TOEFL® essay: Buying a house or a business?TOEFL® Essay: Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare.I want to success with TOEFL® in 4 days!The New Seasons.Boys and girls should attend separate schools

 
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Subscribe to FREE email English course
First name E-mail