TOEFL® essay: Should parents make decisions for older teenagers?

[Richard]

TOEFL essay: Should parents make decisions for older teenagers?
3 Supporting paragraphs:

Parents are expected to provide teenagers with blueprints for making informed decisions in order to prevent irreparable failures as a result of their yes-I-can attitude. On the other hand, they should not let their youngsters to depend entirely on them for making decision. I do believe that this kind of upbringing leads to either spoil them rotten or would affects them with a poor self-image. Thus they would live under the shadow of imaginary wrong decision that would result in failure. In consequence, since teens don't have the maturity, sufficient knowledge, experience and ability to make an informed choice, they need to be supported and they should consult with their elders.

Older teens should have some latitude- depending on the individual- in deciding what they want to do. In this way not only will it enhance their sense of responsibility but also it is a contributing factor to be autonomous person when they get older. Moreover, they will learn how to handle what they face later on. Parents should not attack for stifling creativity in their children because it will leads to inability to make momentous decision in their future life. My main contention is that starting with late teens -teenagers must start making decisions up to their own discretion, so that they can learn how to decide what they want to do in a similar situation. Take “students who want to decide what they want to study in high school” for example. Their interests should not be trampled underfoot by someone’s arbitrary or irrevocable decision.

In addition, inasmuch as having first-hand experience is a crucial factor to be prepared for future life, in some situations and circumstances, older teenage children ought to take their own decisions alone- however, sometimes they find it hard to cope- in the early stages of teenage years that would give them indispensable experience for living alone. Therefore, they will learn from their mistakes that would be more helpful and they will not remain callow after twenty.

I'll write the rest of it later.
Please do not plagiarize
It took me 1 hour to write.
Let me know if you have any suggestions.
_________________
The limits of my language are the limits of my universe.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

[Kitosdad]

Parents are expected to provide teenagers with blueprints for making informed decisions in order to prevent irreparable failures as a result of their yes-I-can attitude. On the other hand, they should not let their youngsters depend entirely on them for making decision(s).
I do believe that this kind of upbringing leads(tends) to either spoil them rotten or (it may) would affect them with a poor self-image.
Thus they would live under the shadow of (having made an)imaginary wrong decision that would result in (their) failure.

In consequence, since teens don't have the maturity, sufficient knowledge, experience and ability to make an informed choice, they need to be supported and they should consult with their elders.

Older teens should have some latitude- depending on the individual- in deciding what they want to do.
In this way not only will it enhance their sense of responsibility but also it (will be a)is a contributing factor (in their becoming an)to be autonomous person when they get older.

Moreover, they will learn how to handle what they (come to/may have to) face later on. Parents should not (be attacked) attack for stifling creativity in their children, because it will lead to (an) inability to make momentous decision(s) in their future life(lives).

My main contention is that starting with late teens -teenagers must (be allowed to nurture the ability to) start making decisions up to (at) their own discretion, so that they can learn how to decide what they want to do in a similar situation.
Take “students who want to decide what they want to study in high school” for example. Their interests should not be trampled underfoot by someone’s arbitrary or irrevocable decision.

In addition, inasmuch as having first-hand experience is a crucial factor (in being) to be prepared for future life, in some situations and circumstances, older teenage children ought to take their own decisions alone- however, sometimes they find it hard to cope- in the early stages of teenage years that would give them indispensable experience for living alone. Therefore, they will learn from their mistakes that (what)would be more helpful, and they will not remain callow after twenty.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is a good essay Richard. I have not altered the context,(I hope), having merely altered it to the way in which I would have written it. Looking forward to the remainder.

Kitos.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Carmen Laura]

I am a teenager and I think that it is sometimes necessary for parents to make decisions for us. However there are parents that don't let their children make choices in their lives and i believe that that is what makes adolecents rebel. Parents should listen to what we want in our lives and advice us.
Thank you for bringing this topic to us.

[Richard]

I'll write the rest of it.
welcome.
_________________
The limits of my language are the limits of my universe.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

[Naiverock]

Richard_Jack, you've written three beautiful paragraphs. It will be wonderful if composed into a integration as an essay.
I feel a little shamed that I didn't know some words in your sentences, due to lack of vocabulary.
I have a little suggestion for you. First paragraph and second one can be combined into one, because their points and evidence seem (or seems, help me!) to be similar.

I've read about an article about the three type parents.
I quote several sentences below that I think is very useful to your topic:
"According to the different ways of showing love, parents can be classified into three types: monarch type, servant type and friend type.
The most common words that friend type of parents often say is 'let's put our heads together and see what we can do'. (I think, to make decisions together is the best way to cultivate children's responsibility and independence.--naiverock)
The friend type of parents are of course welcome to their children, for the friendly, free and sympathetic atmosphere at home is most favorable to the development of youngsters both in body and in mind."

Looking forward to see your whole essay soon.
Sincerely,
naiverock
_________________
It will sure be a lot of fun here to make friends with you guys.

[Richard]

Hi Naiverock
Thank you for your comment and suggestions. I'll consider them.That's kind of you.
I really appreciate it.
_________________
The limits of my language are the limits of my universe.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

[Richard]

I want to add one more paragraph as a first paragraph, the whole essay is gonna be so long.
I didn't think so much for writing this, so there might be some problem:

Decisions, plans, future life! As we all know, these are inextricably intertwined. All people want to have latitude in deciding what they want to do. How could it be otherwise? Are we free to do whatever we like? Definitely not; there are some limitations to deter us from lying faults or committing sins. We have to act within the existing legal framework and do in adherence to rules and laws. Have you ever sat down and contemplated what if someone else imposes her or his idea to you. This situation is preposterous! We consider it an insult to our intelligence or thoughtless behavior towards us. Are all of us perfect to make decisions alone without consulting with someone else? If yes, why a great deal of money spends for publishing books and people purchase them to read. Parents need to consult with someone who is more experienced and they are not perfect let alone there teenagers. Therefore parents ought to help their youngsters to make decisions or in some case they should convince them to obey, albeit not by imposing.
_________________
The limits of my language are the limits of my universe.
Ludwig Wittgenstein