Essay: Canada is a really nice country. She is a country of immigrants...

[Snoowoo]

hi, everyone ,I am snoo from China, I am in canada. I'll appreciate it if someone can revise an email for me.

---------------------
Dear XiaoHua;

Thank you for your email. I am fine here. How about you? Are you still busy with your work? I have been in Canada for one year; I miss you and my friends in China very much. But I have to stay here for another year. I have just got the extension of my visa. Since you ask me a lot about my life here, I’ll tell you a little bit about this country and her culture.

Canada is a really nice country; I like her very much. She is a country of immigrants, so there are many people who come from all over the world and have different colours and appearances. Also there are many Chinese people, either born here or immigrated from China. So you can experience many amazing cultures here. Today is Thanksgiving Day, more than one month earlier than in the USA. There is a parade to celebrate this festival in the town where I am staying in, called Kitchener-Waterloo Oktoberfest. This parade featured one of the most spectacular Thanksgiving Day Parades in Canada and is characterized by German culture.

I heard from my landlord that the town was called ‘Berlin’ many years ago. So I can experience the German culture here without going to Germany. By the way, I heard from my classmate also that there are a lot of beautiful French buildings in Canada, and Montreal is called ‘Little Paris’ . Unluckily, I have not been there yet. Maybe I expect to visit there this winter. In one word, Canada is an attractive country just because she is a multicultural country, and cultures here are protected properly and every culture is respected. My friend here told me that Canada is a mixing pot for cultures and the USA is a melting pot for cultures. This might be a short summery of a comparison between the two countries.

I have been here for one year, I still dislike the food here. The food in the supermarket is almost ready and you just add some eggs or milk to eat it. There are too much cheese and butter in the food which can seldom be found in Chinese food and it is often processed or kept for a long time, since the food is pick up from the farm. I don’t think it is healthy. I still like traditional Chinese foods. I greatly miss the steamed bun, dumpling and many other delicious foods prepared in my dining hall in my former university in China.

But as a saying goes: do in Rome as Rome does, so the best policy to live in a new culture is to accustom yourself to the new environment. In fact, most people feel culture shock when traveling to a foreign culture. If you accept it and try to be a member in the new culture, it will be an unforgettable experience in your life. Otherwise maybe you will miss a terrific experience in your life. So on the one hand, I cook Chinese food every day; on the other hand, I try the western foods in the supermarket as well. It is more convenient to buy the food in a supermarket than to cook every day and this saves me much time.

Fall has come here already, the most beautiful season in Canada. You will see many colourful trees here at this time. But unfortunately, we got a lot rain in the past several days. I hope it is a nice day. It is said that it is the one of the best place to see the autumn views. I would like to take some photos and send them back to you then.

Anyway, if you get a chance to visit Canada, let me know ASAP, I will be a very good guide for you. I hope you that everything is going well.

Take care,
snoo woo
October. 12, 09

[Snoowoo]

any help?

[Kitosdad]

Good morning Snoowoo. Your e-mail is more than understadable with only a couple of minor errors.

Canada is not a "she/her", it is a "it".

"There are too much cheese"....... There is

"Maybe I expect to visit"..............Maybe/Perhaps I will visit

" do in Rome as Rome does" ......When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

I've only skimmed your long e-mail, but these are a few corrections that stood out.

Kitos.
_________________
If you need me, I'm here.

[Tomasito]

Snoowoo! your email is brilliant. You wrote it in a simple way. In a way which everyone can understand without problems. I think anyone who reads your email start getting interesting about Canada. well done.
_________________
I am the product of my education and experience.

[Richard]

Hi Snoowoo
(Thank you kitos I didn't know this one:
When in Rome, do as the Romans do)

1- A person who is able to write such a beautiful letter, must not use the pronoun "she" for a country...use "it"
2-you mixed up these verbs:
Emigrate to/from- e,g: the were emigrated from…
Emigrate (verb) =to leave your own country in order to live in another country
Immigrate (verb) = to come into a country in order to live there permanently
Immigrant (noun) someone who enters another country to live there permanently-example: an immigrate from Eastern country
Migrate(verb)=if people migrate, they go to live in another area or country, especially in order to find work

3-colours(colors=American English, colour=British English)

4-since the food is pick(picking/picked) up from the farm.
5-You wanted to use this:

One the one hand….on the other…..
_________________
The limits of my language are the limits of my universe.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

[Richard]

Hi Tomasito
where are you? again you disappeared?
I liked your letter Snoowoo.
_________________
The limits of my language are the limits of my universe.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

[Snoowoo]

thanks, I hope I can get help from you guys

[Smanani]

Hi! I am a new member of ESL forum.My nsme is Satyajit.Rightnow I am in india.My english is not that much good,that's why i joined this forums so I can improve my english.

[Nzuahp]