| Why do some students study abroad? | Reasons why people work other than earning a living |
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 #1 (permalink) Tue Oct 20, 2009 16:07 pm TOEFL essay: describe the most significant challenges to academic success. |
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hi everybody! Here is my essay.
In my whole life people who I met always tried to get academic success. Anyway some of them got it but some of them couldn't get it. Some of them couldn't because they didn't know that what are the most significant challenges to academic success. In my opinion, they are study regularly, take notes clearly and listen to the teacher carefully when you are in the class.
First of all one of the most effective things to be successful is study regularly. Basically study regularly means study day to day. For instance, you go to school every morning and then you learn something in class. When you come back your home, you should study your lessons instead of playing computer or something like that. If you study day to day indeed you are on true way.
Furthermore the second of the most important strategis to academic success is take notes clearly. For example when your teacher teaches subject in the lesson, you should write that what she says quickly and clearly. When I was in high school my classmate who is my best friend always took notes. Therefore he is a businessman now. His career is good because he studied too much in fact when he was at a collage he kept on taking notes. That's why he is successful.
The last thing of the most significant challenges to academic success is listen to the teacher carefully. For instance if your teacher teaches you something which is important, you should listen to her carefully. If you do this advise, you can learn important information which was taught by your teacher when you're in class. In addition when I was eighteen in high school, I always listened to my teacher carefully. Therefore when I graduated from high school, I was valecdictorian.
In summary, when we are child, we can't understand that how much important to have academic success. After we grow up suddenly we realise that to be a successful person is the most significant thing in the life. Therefore for not to realise those things lately, you should do something. I have come to the conclusion that if you want to get academic success, you must study regularly, take notes clearly and listen to the teacher carefully.
TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture on Animal Behavior by a professor of Biology |
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 Sel
You can meet me at english-test.net
Joined: 15 Oct 2009
Posts: 60
Location: Turkey- Istanbul
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| #2 (permalink) Wed Oct 21, 2009 7:27 am TOEFL essay: describe the most significant challenges to academic success. |
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| Sel wrote: |
In my whole life(, the) people who I met( 'am acquainted with' should be better) always tried(are trying) to get academic success. Anyway some of them got(have got) it but some of them couldn't get it(haven't). Some of them couldn't because they didn't know that(omit 'that') what are the most significant challenges to academic success.(This sentence should be revised, for the reason and result do not match naturally. Or you should try to support this point) In my opinion, they are study regularly, take notes clearly and listen to the teacher carefully when you are in the class.(What does two 'they' imply? Confused; Also be aware of 'be doing')
First of all one of the most effective(indispensable or crucial) things to be successful is study (be studying or be to study) regularly. Basically study(ing) regularly means study(ing) day to(by) day. For instance, you go to school every morning and then you learn something in class. When you come back your home, you should study your lessons instead of playing computer or something like that. If you study day to(by) day indeed you are on true way(?). (You will definitely get improvement as long as you insist on studying everyday.)
Furthermore the second of the most important strategis(strategies) to academic success is take(taking or to take) notes clearly. For example when your teacher teaches subject(s) in the lesson(in class), you should write (write down) that(omit 'that') what she says quickly and clearly. When I was in high school my classmate(one of my classmates) who is my best friend always took notes. Therefore he is a businessman now. His career is good because he studied too much in fact when he was at a collage he kept on taking notes. That's why he is successful. (I think this example is not appropriate here. His success in business does not belong to Academic success. Why not use some illustration of historic celebrities?)
The last thing of the most significant challenges to academic success is listen(ing) to the teacher carefully. For instance if your teacher teaches you something which is important, you should listen to her carefully. If you do this advise, you can learn important information which was taught by your teacher when you're in class. In addition when I was eighteen in high school, I always listened to my teacher carefully. Therefore when I graduated from high school, I was valecdictorian(valedictorian).
In summary, when we are child(were children), we can't(couldn't) understand that how much important(it's so important) to have academic success. After we grow up suddenly we realise(realize) that to be a successful person is the most significant thing in the life. Therefore for not to realise(realize) those things lately(too late), you should do something. I have come to the conclusion that if you want to get academic success, you must study regularly, take notes clearly and listen to the teacher carefully. |
To be honest, there are still some errors I haven't corrected, and I suggest you think more of this topic and rewrite it.
The very important thing you should take much attention next time is understanding the topic. This topic is about challenges and academic success. I think we should choose one significant challenge and support our opinion by using examples of academic success or failure.
If my suggestion has made you feel disappoint, I am sorry.
Hope you will do a better job next time.
_________________
It will sure be a lot of fun here to make friends with you guys. |
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Naiverock
I'm here quite often ;-)
Joined: 08 Oct 2009
Posts: 204
Location: Hangzhou, PRC
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| #3 (permalink) Wed Oct 21, 2009 8:50 am TOEFL essay: describe the most significant challenges to academic success. |
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| Naiverock wrote: |
| Sel wrote: |
In my whole life(, the) people who I met( 'am acquainted with' should be better) always tried(are trying but it is past tense?) to get academic success. Anyway some of them got(have got I mean get academic success) it but some of them couldn't get it(haven't). Some of them couldn't because they didn't know that(omit 'that') what are the most significant challenges to academic success. In my opinion, they are study regularly, take notes clearly and listen to the teacher carefully when you are in the class.(What does two 'they' imply? Confused; Also be aware of 'be doing')
First of all one of the most effective(indispensable or crucial) things to be successful is study (be studying or be to study) regularly. Basically study(ing) regularly means study(ing) day to(by) day. For instance, you go to school every morning and then you learn something in class. When you come back your home, you should study your lessons instead of playing computer or something like that. If you study day to(by) day indeed you are on true way(?). (You will definitely get improvement as long as you insist on studying everyday.)
Furthermore the second of the most important strategis(strategies) to academic success is take(taking or to take) notes clearly. For example when your teacher teaches subject(s) in the lesson(in class), you should write (write down) that(omit 'that') what she says quickly and clearly. When I was in high school my classmate who is my best friend always took notes. Therefore he is a businessman now. His career is good because he studied too much in fact when he was at a collage he kept on taking notes. That's why he is successful. (I think this example is not appropriate here. His success in business does not belong to Academic success.= but he is successful beause of his academic success If you are successful in your school life you'll be successful in your work life)
The last thing of the most significant challenges to academic success is listen(ing) to the teacher carefully. For instance if your teacher teaches you something which is important, you should listen to her carefully. If you do this advise, you can learn important information which was taught by your teacher when you're in class. In addition when I was eighteen in high school, I always listened to my teacher carefully. Therefore when I graduated from high school, I was valecdictorian(valedictorian).
In summary, when we are child(were children I tried to use present simple ), we can't(couldn't) understand that how much important(it's so important) to have academic success. After we grow up suddenly we realise(realize) that to be a successful person is the most significant thing in the life. Therefore for not to realise(realize) those things lately(too late), you should do something. I have come to the conclusion that if you want to get academic success, you must study regularly, take notes clearly and listen to the teacher carefully. |
To be honest, there are still some errors I haven't corrected, and I suggest you think more of this topic and rewrite it.
The very important thing you should take much attention next time is understanding the topic. This topic is about challenges and academic success. I think we should choose one significant challenge and support our opinion by using examples of academic success or failure.
If my suggestion has made you feel disappoint, I am sorry.
Hope you will do a better job next time. |
no, this topic is about the most significant challengeS so there can be many challenges to academic success. And in my opinion academic success is about your success when you're in your school life. |
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Sel
You can meet me at english-test.net
Joined: 15 Oct 2009
Posts: 60
Location: Turkey- Istanbul
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| #4 (permalink) Wed Oct 21, 2009 14:31 pm TOEFL essay: describe the most significant challenges to academic success. |
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I agree that there would be many challenges and academic success could be understood as success in school life. I respect your apprehension of the topic.
All my suggestions are just personal perspective out of my genuine heart.
If some are helpful to you, I would be very glad.
If some are wrong or misleading, I am sorry. Please let me know and I will avoid making same kind of mistakes.
_________________
It will sure be a lot of fun here to make friends with you guys. |
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Naiverock
I'm here quite often ;-)
Joined: 08 Oct 2009
Posts: 204
Location: Hangzhou, PRC
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| #5 (permalink) Sat Oct 24, 2009 17:31 pm TOEFL essay: describe the most significant challenges to academic success. |
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| maybe you're right I don't know:) I have just tried yo write something about toefl and thank you for your consider. |
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Sel
You can meet me at english-test.net
Joined: 15 Oct 2009
Posts: 60
Location: Turkey- Istanbul
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| Why do some students study abroad? | Reasons why people work other than earning a living |
