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Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma



 
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ESL Forums | English Vocabulary, Grammar and Idioms
"ye" is the same that "you"? | Children is singular or plural?
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Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma #1 (permalink) Fri May 21, 2004 20:03 pm   Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma
 

Hi everyone,

I am new on this forum.
Could someone please tell me which form is correct:
do you mind "me" or "my" asking? Personally, I think "me' is correct but I saw "my" form the other day and I got confused.

Thank you in advance! :)
NewNyorker
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Joined: 21 May 2004
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Verbal noun/gerund/mind my asking #2 (permalink) Sat May 22, 2004 10:16 am   Verbal noun/gerund/mind my asking
 

Hi NewNyorker and welcome to our forum,

You have to options of expression your idea:

1) With a relative clause:

Do you mind if I ask?

2) With a verbal noun (gerund):

Do you mind my asking?

In the second construction you have to use the possessive adjective my because it relates to the verbal noun asking.

Let me know if this makes sense to you.

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Torsten
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Thank you #3 (permalink) Sat May 22, 2004 21:24 pm   Thank you
 

Thanks a lot for your response:)

I knew "do you mind if I ask" form before but the other one I overheard and wasn't sure about the usage. Until now, of course:)

I've lived in NY for few months now and I must say surprisingly many native speakers make mistakes.

I like this forum, I'm sure I'll be visiting it often. It's well organized and helpful:)

Greetings!
NewNyorker
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Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma #4 (permalink) Wed Apr 29, 2009 14:30 pm   Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma
 

Hi Dear Torsten,
You mean we cannot say 'Do you mind me asking?' !
I also wonder whether 'Do you mind if ...' is a relative clause or an adverbial one.
And does "Do you mind if' mean 'MAY' ?
Many thanks,
Morteza
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Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma #5 (permalink) Wed Apr 29, 2009 14:49 pm   Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma
 

Hi Morteza,

There is a very subtle difference between - Do you mind my smoking? and Do you mind me smoking? In the first one it refers to the 'smoking' and in the second it refers to 'me personally'. That said I wouldn't worry about the difference. You second point: Do you mind if ...? is, as you say, another polite way of asking: May I ..?

Alan
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Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma #6 (permalink) Thu Apr 30, 2009 2:57 am   Do you mind me asking/do you mind my asking dilemma
 

Hi Dear Alan,
I am profoundly grateful to you for your help and encouragement.
Regards,
Morteza
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I'm here quite often ;-)


Joined: 31 Oct 2008
Posts: 450
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