TOEFL® essay: The easier the preparation of food is, the more we change our life

[Love_English0405]

Please check the grammar, vocabulary for me and all comments are welcomed.

Topic 11: Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

As the world has been changing more and more rapidly with the development of the new technology, the process of food production has become simpler. This also changes the way people live.

In modern society, people have a large amount of work to do and even some of them have become workaholics. This leads to the fact that we always want to save as much time as we can to complete our work or to relax. The result is people tend to eat fast food instead of spending a period of time enjoying their own meal. For example, in many offices, it is obvious that some love-working officers often bring sandwiches for lunch so that they can spend the lunch time to sleep or to finish their work.

Fast food has become more popular to people all over the world, especially the young. The number of the company which has the fast food production are increasing rapidly with some famous names as McDonald, KFC, Lotteria,… and their products are sold worldwide. Fast food is nearly part of the young’s culture when they can get it everywhere. In most of schools in canteens, fast food is suggested to be the most prevalent. Although adults do not want their children to eat such kind of food, they cannot prevent them from eating them because fast food is too ubiquitous. And when these youngsters become adults, they will have the habit of eating so much fast food. As the time goes by, these will change the way we live.

To some extents, these changes have bad effects on our live. We seem to live more hastily and not have enough time to enjoy the life. By the way, we need to avoid being dependent on fast food. And while there are still people who love cooking with a simple process supported by modern machines like the stove, microwave,… and people who can spend hours for a meal, we can believe that the easy preparation of food will not change the whole world.

TOEFL listening discussions: What started this conversation?

[Kitosdad]

Please check the grammar, vocabulary for me and all comments are welcomed.

Topic 11: Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

As the world has been changing more and more rapidly with the development of the new technology, the process of food production has become simpler. This HAS ALSO CHANGED the way people live.

In modern society, people have a large amount of work to do; and even some of them have become workaholics.
This STEMS FROM the fact that we always want to save as much time as we can to complete our work or to relax.
The result is THAT people tend to eat fast food instead of spending a period of time enjoying their own PREPARED mealS.

For example, in many offices, it is obvious that some love-working officers often bring sandwiches for lunch so that they can spend the lunch-BREAK sleepING or finishING their work.

Fast food has become more popular WITH people all over the world, especially the young.

The number of the companIES whO SPECIALISE IN fast food production are increasing rapidly with some famous names, SUCH as McDonaldS, KFC, Lotteria,… and their products are sold worldwide.

Fast food is part of the young culture, BECAUSE they can get it ALMOST everywhere.
In most school canteens, fast food is suggested to be the most prevalent, AND although MOST PARENTS do not want their children eatING such kindS of food, they cannot prevent them from eating them because fast food is too ubiquitous.
When these youngsters become adults, they THEMSELVES will have the habit of eating so much fast food, AND AS time goes by, these HABITS will change the way we live.

To A CERTAIN DEGREE, these changes have A bad effects on our liveS.
We seem to live more hastily, and not TO have enough time to enjoy OUR LIVES.
We need to avoid beCOMING dependent on fast food.

BUT while there are still people who love cooking with a simple process, supported by modern machines, and who can spend hours PREPARING a meal, THEN we can believe that the easy preparation of food will not change the whole world.

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A well thought out essay.

Kitos.
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Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Love_English0405]

Thank you for your checking

[Love_English0405]

Do you have any comments to my grammar so that I can improve it? I always find it difficult to identify my grammar errors myself while grammar plays an important role in an essay and if I have too much errors, I will lose so many scores.