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IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...



 
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IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #1 (permalink) Tue Jan 19, 2010 3:34 am   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

Hi, I'm a new member here. I'm preparing for the Ielts test. I wish the forum members could help me with my writing essay. thanks in advance :D. here is my essay.
It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports and music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.
Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

-------------------------------------------------
Whether training is more important than natural talents to have a professional sportsman or artist remains a controversial issue. Some people think that any one can be trained to reach the highest level in their own profession, while others generally believe that God only bestow talents to some individuals. The essay will look at both these views.

Supporters of the idea that people can be professional by training have definite reasons for their arguments. First of all, if a person is provided a scientific method of training, he can get the best result. By training and regular practice, any one can gradually control the weakness and enhance the strength because it is said that practice makes perfect. Secondly, a man with the talent gifted from God is unlikely to become a star without practice or even without a good chance.

For example, people all over the world know that Bruce Lee was a talented star but if he had never met a good teacher, he himself would never have found his own ability. Finally, it is the endeavor, passion and studies not only the talents that make a successful person. It is definitely true in the modern life nowadays. Because many new things and new jobs appear every day, no one can be sure that a man is cut for a programmer or a banker.

On the other hand, those who are defenders of the second opinion also find a firm ground for their thought. To begin with, the fact that good training and practice can help a person reach the highest of his skills is true in scientific fields rather than in arts or sports. For instance, a small child can be trained in some physical activities to become smarter and have well built body. However, it’s impossible for him to become an athlete because it exceeds his capability.

Furthermore, many proofs in the real life show that God only bestows certain talents to some individuals while others do not have that luck. Beethoven can serve as a typical example. In fact, he was deaf, and he had no chance to enjoy his work whenever he practiced. However, he was the greatest musician of all time. Besides, some kid stars can shine at the early age such as Dakota Fanning, but on the contrary, many adults with the passion for performing and many years of training in college are unable to become a good performer. In short, apart from passion and training, people also need some capabilities or instincts to be successful.

On balance, although training and practice are important and necessary, in general, talents and instincts are essential for a person to succeed in his own career. It is, therefore, advisable that everyone should find his own strength and develop skills relating to this strength.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from a life sciences class (4)
Tuxedola2t
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IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certai #2 (permalink) Tue Jan 19, 2010 13:55 pm   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certai
 

-------------------------------------------------
Whether training is more important than natural talent to have a professional sportsman or artist remains a controversial issue.
Some people think that (anyone - ONE WORD) can be trained to reach the highest level in their own profession, while others generally believe that God only/ALONE bestowS talents to ON some individuals. The essay will look at both OF these views.

Supporters of the idea that people can beCOME professional ONLY by training, have definite reasons for their arguments.
First of all, if a person is provided WITH a scientific method of training, he can get the best resultS.
By training and WITH regular practice, (anyone) can gradually control theIR weaknessES and enhance theIR strengthS, because it is OFTEN said that, "practice makes perfect."
Secondly, a man with talent gifted/BESTOWED BY God is unlikely to become a star without practice, or even without BEING GIVEN a good chance.

For example, people all over the world know that Bruce Lee was a talented star, but if he had never met a good teacher, he himself would never have found/CAPITALISED ON his own ability.

On the other hand, those who are defenders of the second opinion also find a firm ground for their thought. To begin with, the fact that good training and practice can help a person reach the highest of his skills is true in scientific fields, rather than in arts or sports.
For instance, a small child can be trained in some physical activities to become smarter and have A well-built body. However, it’s impossible for him to become an athlete because it exceeds his capability.

Furthermore, many proofs in the real life show that God only bestows certain talents ON some individuals, while others do not have that luck/GIFT.

Beethoven can serve as a typical example. In fact, he was deaf, and he had no chance to enjoy his work whenever he practiced. However, he was PROBABLY/CONSIDERED the greatest musician of all time.
Besides, some CHILD stars can shine at the AN early age such as Dakota Fanning, but on the contrary, many adults with the passion for performing and many years of training in college are unable to become good performerS.
In short, apart from passion and training, people also need some capabilities or instincts to be successful.

On balance, although training and practice are important and necessary, in general, talents and instincts are essential for a person to succeed in his own career. It is, therefore, advisable that everyone should find his own strengthS and develop THE skills relatED to this strength.

Finally, it is the endeavoUr, passion and studies, AND not only the talent that make a successful person. THIS is definitely true in the modern life nowadays WORLD. Because OF THE many new things and new jobs THAT appear every day, no one can be sure that/IF a man is cut OUT TO BE a programmer or a banker.
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A pretty good essay Tux, but you cannot say,"finally" half-way through it, and then go on to write more and more. 7.5 /10

Kitos.
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IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #3 (permalink) Tue Jan 19, 2010 14:44 pm   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

Hi Tuxedola!
Nice essay, but it contains a mistake:
Beethoven's loss of hearing begun at the age of 26,
and at about the age of 44 he was almost totally deaf.
By that time he had composed many great pieces of music.
Nikoulia
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IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #4 (permalink) Tue Jan 19, 2010 15:12 pm   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

Hi Kitos,
Would you please tell me the meaning of 'capitalised' and 'cut out' in the essay?

Regards - Mixmixi
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Mixmixi
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IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #5 (permalink) Tue Jan 19, 2010 17:07 pm   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

In this context, "cut out" means, he was destined/meant to become great.

Capitalise, to earn from his work, and to improve his capabilities.
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Kitosdad
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Location: ESSEN, Germany, (but English.)

IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #6 (permalink) Tue Jan 19, 2010 17:27 pm   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

Thank you for the answer my friend.

Mixmixi
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Let's make a deal; I'll correct every single one of your grammatical mistakes AND YOU DO THE SAME FAVOUR FOR ME.
Mixmixi
I'm here quite often ;-)


Joined: 21 Dec 2009
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Location: A better place to be

IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #7 (permalink) Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:18 am   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

thank all for your comments
Tuxedola2t
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Joined: 19 Jan 2010
Posts: 2

IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain... #8 (permalink) Mon May 17, 2010 17:38 pm   IELTS writing: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain...
 

Hi:)
I'm new here and I'm also preparing for IELTS test. I've written an essay on the same topic as above:

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports and music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.
Discuss both these views and give your opinion.


Can somebody check it?

-------------------------
Nowadays, it is a common view that some idividuals are gifted by God for example in music or sport abilities and exist other people who can make the same by constant training from early childhood.
Which way is better? This essay will consider it.

First of all, talented people have a "spark" which long-trained, normal ones usually don't posses ( that's why we call them "normal"). For example gifted person with three years of dance training, can have worse technique but has something more than just techinque- some kind of light , love, commitment- something that people can notice, something what will take this person to a whole new level to contrary to this hard-worker dancer with 10 years of practise who has nothing inside.

Furthermore is quite esier to work out more and longer by endowed person because: firstly sucess comes more rapidly and secondly the process of learning is more esasier due their abilities than to those taught from early childhood. For instance young talented musician will be more pressed by his teacher , he will work harder than this "only" good one who nobody sees.

Thirdly well-trained individual can get bored with his ocuppation or even can get depressed seeing somebody achieving grants much more faster despite of the same lenght of carieer and she or he will consequently falling down psychically and mentally.

But on the other hand a "spark" has one major disadvantage.
Endowed idividuals can become lazy , uncooperative, rude, "better than others" because they are "chosen by God" . This attitude is very dangerous because leads to lack of technique (they train less) and bad relationships with others.

All in all I think talented person will be always better than only well-exercised one because has something more to show and provided that she or he will practise as much as others , and will take no exuces to train less.

-------------------

As we can se I have problem with style and usage of different words ;/
Alfinete
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Joined: 17 May 2010
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