please check the following essay for me

[Zhuang]

Topic: Why do people attend to college or university?

There are lots of choices for people contribute to their life in a modern society. But, almost people decide to go to college or university. Why do people decide that ? Three common reasons are that they want to increase their knowledge, have a good career preparation, and they also want to get new experience.
People attend to college or university can obviously increase their knowledge. There are lots of teachers or professors who can teach you not only the basic knowledge but also communication skills. With their teaching, you can learn a lot of new knowledge which is useful for your life and your future job. After finishing, you can work in fields you have just studied.
Also, you can prepare for your career well. When you attend to college or university, you can choose the majors you are interested in to improve. Teachers will teach you the major you make your choice. Moreover, they can teach you how to cooperate with teammates, how to lead your group to finish your task, how to face and solve all problems, etc. These things are very helpful for you to join your career and your life.
Beside a good career preparation, you can experience your life. Most of students must leave their hometown to go to college or university. So, it is very difficult for them to solve some problems which they’ve never had. For instance, before studying in college or university, their life were arranged by their parents, their schedule were arranged by their teachers, but when they attend to college or university, they have to arrange those things.
People attend college or university because they believe that they can gain much more knowledge, have career preparation, and they can have new experienced life. These are just a few reasons why they choose to study at college or university. In my opinion, it is the best choice for you to change your life.

TOEFL listening lectures: The lecturer uses the Gandara culture as an example of what?

[Kitosdad]

Good morning Zhuang. You have good ideas, but you need to learn to express your thoughts more clearly. Try to increase your knowledge of writing by reading more. There are many good essays written here that would surely be very helpful to you.

Kitos.
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Zhuang]

I understand what you mean, Kitos.
Thanks a lot.