Rich life and personal behavior

[Jennycharm]

TOPIC: These days everyone seems to have more and more possessions (e.g computers, cars, mobile phones, etc.). Our strong desire to own these is making us less aware of important personal qualities such as kindness and concern for others. Do you agree or disagree? (give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

Essay:
In modern life, people always want to have a high living standard. In other words, luxury, expensive properties are what they need in their houses. I don't totally disagree with this point but I think it makes society lack of people with good personal qualities. There are some reasons lead to it.

Firstly, people nowadays are more and more busy. People want to earn a lot of money to buy many things. Their needs is not just a basic things like food, clothes or even a house. But now these things have to be modern ones. For example, I have a bicycle, I hope someday I will have a car. This is my desire. So I begin in a circle of working untill I have enough money to comfort my needs. So this is one of the reasons why people cannot have time to concern for others.

Secondly, some people' purpose is earning money as much as possible, so the ways to do this is what they concern the most. Besides some good ways such as hard-working or do a lot of jobs, some people do some bad ones like corruption, tax evasion, smuggling, etc. These make people not believe in what called fundamentals of human behavior.

However, not almost people who are rich and successful are unkind. For instance, I saw that nowadays, there are a lot of the rich who have donated a lot of money to many charity organisations, saved many lives all over the world. This actions show kindness and humanism.

To sum up, it is clear that people nowadays are too busy to earn money as well as to own possessions that they don't have time to concern for others. Some even have bad behaviors for others in particular and for society in general. But still there are a lot of people who are kind and helpful for life.

( thank for reading and correcting my mistakes)

TOEFL listening lectures: What aspect of Ben Franklin's life does the speaker mainly discuss?

[Kitosdad]

TOPIC: These days everyone seems to have more and more possessions (e.g computers, cars, mobile phones, etc.). Our strong desire to own these is making us less aware of important personal qualities such as kindness and concern for others. Do you agree or disagree? (give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

In modern life, people always want to have a high living standard. In other words, luxury, expensive properties are what they need in their houses. I don't totally disagree with this point but I think it makes society lack of people with good personal qualities. There are some reasons lead to it.

Firstly, people nowadays are more and more busy. People want to earn a lot of money to buy many things. Their needs is not just a basic things like food, clothes or even a house. But now these things have to be modern ones. For example, I have a bicycle, I hope someday I will have a car. This is my desire. So I begin in a circle of working untill I have enough money to comfort my needs. So this is one of the reasons why people cannot have time to concern for others.

Secondly, some people' purpose is earning money as much as possible, so the ways to do this is what they concern the most. Besides some good ways such as hard-working or do a lot of jobs, some people do some bad ones like corruption, tax evasion, smuggling, etc. These make people not believe in what called fundamentals of human behavior.

However, not almost people who are rich and successful are unkind. For instance, I saw that nowadays, there are a lot of the rich who have donated a lot of money to many charity organisations, saved many lives all over the world. This actions show kindness and humanism.

To sum up, it is clear that people nowadays are too busy to earn money as well as to own possessions that they don't have time to concern for others. Some even have bad behaviors for others in particular and for society in general. But still there are a lot of people who are kind and helpful for life.

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Good afternoon Jenny, and welcome to our Forum. You appear to have sufficient vocabulary and command of English to have written a better essay than this. There are many simple errors in your composition. I would ask you to again review it and see if you can improve it. I will then be more than happy to edit it.
I really need to read more of your work before I can make an honest judgement on your true potential. Please be good enough to do as I ask.

Kitos.
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Jennycharm]

thank you very much, Kitos. I appreciate it. I corrected my mistakes and I try my best. I hope you will give me some helpful advice. Thanks again

[Jennycharm]

In modern life, everybody tends to try to create a high living standard. In other words, luxury, expensive properties are what they need in their houses. I don't totally disagree with this point. But I think that desire sometimes has bad influence on individuals and society. There are some reasons lead to it.

Firstly, people nowadays are busier and busier.They want to earn a lot of money to buy many things. Their needs are not only just a basic things like food, clothes or even a simple house but also the modern ones. For example, I have a bicycle, I hope someday I will have a car. This is my desire. So I begin to work all day untill I have enough money to comfort my needs. This is one of the reasons why people cannot have time to concern for others.

Secondly, some people's purpose is earning money as much as possible, in the shortest time, so the way to do this is what they concern the most. Besides some good ways such as hard-working or doing a lot of jobs, some bad ones maybe like corruption, tax evasion, smuggling, etc. I think these actions are disavantages for society. It will strongly influence the thinking of other people about the personal behavior.

Besides some people have bad behavior, there are a lot of rich people with golden hearts. For instance, I saw that nowadays, more and more charity organisations established, people who are rich or not all donated their money, clothes, food to poor people. They saved many lives all over the world. These actions show that humanbeings tend to try to become kind and altruistic.

To sum up, it is clear that humans nowadays are too busy to earn money as well as to own possessions, so they don't have time to concern for others. Some even have bad behaviors for others in particular and for society in general. But there are still a lot of people who are kind and helpful for life.

[Kitosdad]

In modern life, everybody tends to try to /create/ACHIEVE/ a highER living standard. In other words, luxurIOUS AND expensive properties ITEMS are what they need in their houses. I DO NOT totally disagree with this point(,) but I think that desireS sometimes has HAVE bad influenceS on individuals and society. There are some reasons THAT lead to it.

Firstly, people nowadays are busier and busier.They want to earn a lot of money to buy many things. Their needs are not only just a FOR basic things like food, clothes or even a simple house(,) but also the modern ones.
For example, I have a bicycle, I hope someday I will have a car. This is my desire. So I begin to work all day until I have enough money to comfort ACQUIRE my needs. This is one of the reasons why people cannot have time to concern for THINK OF others.

Secondly, some people's purpose IN LIFE is IN earning as much MONEY as possible in the shortest time, so the way to do BUT THE MANNER IN WHICH THEY DO this is what they concernS MY the most. Besides some good ways such as hard-working or doing a lot of jobs, THEY ALSO INDULGE IN some bad ones maybe like corruption, tax evasion, smuggling, etc. I think these actions are disaDvantages AGAINST society. It will strongly influence the thinking of other people about theIR personal behavior.

Besides some people havING bad behavior, there are a lot of rich people with golden hearts. For instance, I saw that nowadays, more and more charity organisations HAVE BEEN established(.)People who are rich or not all donate their money, clothes, food to poor people. TheIR ACTIONS HAVE saved many lives all over the world. These actions show that human beings tend to try to become kind and altruistic.

To sum up, it is clear that humans nowadays are too busy IN earnING money as well as to own possessions, so they don't have time to HAVE MUCH concern for others. Some even have bad behaviors for others in particular(,) and for society in general. But there are still a lot of people who are kind and helpful IN life.
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Good morning Jenny. Thank you for your renewed efforts.
Kitos. 7.5/10
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.