TOEFL® essay: Which would prefer working for? a large company or a small company

[Arkan]

Good morning, Kitos. can you help me to correct my essay? Thank you

Topic:
Some people prefer working for a very large company that has several hundred employees. Others prefer working for a small company where they know all of their co-workers. Which do you prefer?

I will graduate one year later and maybe I will find a job when I get my master degree. And it is likely that I would work in a company. If it is possible that I can find a proper job in a company, I would like to work in a big company that has several hundred employees.

Above all, a company, with many employees, has more profits and incoming than a small one, so it can hire many employees.And a Large number of employees can also produce lots of products and provide much service to its clients and then gain lots of money in turns for their company. Therefore, a large company is likely has more money and resources than a small one and to work in a large company I will take low risk such as bankruptcy. Thus I can work in a stable environment if I work in a large company

Second, in a large company there are many chances of promotion and changing tasks. A large company hires so many people and the employees are distributed in different positions. For example, some employees are in charge of production. Some people's responsibility is to management or to design a new product. consequently, in a large company I have a lot of chance to do different tasks if I am qualified. And also the chance of promotion is much; so that if i work hard and get a good result i can get a higher position.

Third, working with different people whose backgrounds are quite different will inspire me and bring me a lot of new knowledge. In a large company, the employees were graduated from different university with different major. Thus these employees will hold different perspectives toward different issues and sharing the ideas with them is likely inspire me and prompt me to think more deeply and wildly to a certain issue. In addition, I can broaden my knowledge when I am working with different employees with different background.

In conclusion, there are there main merits to work in a big company. And working in a big company will bring me safety, chance of promotion and new knowledge.

~ Arkan

TOEFL listening lectures: Why does the lecturer mention Leonardo da Vinci?

[Kitosdad]

I will graduate one year later and maybe I will find a job when I get my master degree. And it is likely that I would work in a company. If it is possible that I can find a proper job in a company, I would like to work in a big company that has several hundred employees.

Above all, a company, with many employees, has more profits and incoming than a small one, so it can hire many employees.And a Large number of employees can also produce lots of products and provide much service to its clients and then gain lots of money in turns for their company. Therefore, a large company is likely has more money and resources than a small one and to work in a large company I will take low risk such as bankruptcy. Thus I can work in a stable environment if I work in a large company

Second, in a large company there are many chances of promotion and changing tasks. A large company hires so many people and the employees are distributed in different positions. For example, some employees are in charge of production. Some people's responsibility is to management or to design a new product. consequently, in a large company I have a lot of chance to do different tasks if I am qualified. And also the chance of promotion is much; so that if i work hard and get a good result i can get a higher position.

Third, working with different people whose backgrounds are quite different will inspire me and bring me a lot of new knowledge. In a large company, the employees were graduated from different university with different major. Thus these employees will hold different perspectives toward different issues and sharing the ideas with them is likely inspire me and prompt me to think more deeply and wildly to a certain issue. In addition, I can broaden my knowledge when I am working with different employees with different backgroundS.

In conclusion, there are there main merits to work in a big company. And working in a big company will bring me safety, chance of promotion and new knowledge.

~ Arkan
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Good morning Arkan. You have an excellent vocabulary, and your spelling is very good.
However, your sentence structure and punctuation are very poor.
These are two very important weaknesses which must be corrected if you are to improve.
Practice and study are the only two roads open to you.
The correct placement of words, and also the tense of those words, are vital necessities when writing in English.
I would suggest that you spend some time reading the many articles written on these threads, especially those written by Alan on the Home page. There you will be able to study the correct structuring of sentences, and the correct form of the tenses being used.

Kitos. 7/10
_________________
Keep it simple ... Keep it interesting.

[Arkan]

Thanks for your advice Kitos!
I will follow your advice, practice and study more.