uses of that which vs. when.

[Sonia*]

Good Morning Teachers,

1. My greatest thrill is when I win. (Incorrect)

2. My greatest thrill is that which comes when I win. (Correct)

Please tell me why the sentence number two is correct. I am too confused to get at the reason behind the correction, which my teacher marked in my notebook.

Thanks a lot!

Sonia*

[Mister Micawber]

#1 is not wrong; it is simply an informal expression.
#2 is more wrong than #1 in that it is hyper-formal-- too formal for any normal use.

I am afraid that your teacher is working from an old textbook or little real experience. Here is a more appropriate version: My greatest thrill is winning.
_________________
Native English teacher at Mister Micawber's

[Sonia*]

Hi, Mister micawber

Thanks for the more appropriate version: My greatest thrill is winning.

Best Wishes!
Sonia*