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could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence



 
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ESL Forum | English Vocabulary, Grammar and Idioms
What does 'shredding Christmas trees' mean? | One of the most slippery grammar trippers...
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could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence #1 (permalink) Sat Nov 13, 2010 4:56 am   could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence
 

" Wishing that our services can assit you in the upcoming event "
Hknwbec
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Joined: 09 Aug 2010
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Location: Hong Kong

could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence #2 (permalink) Sat Nov 13, 2010 9:23 am   could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence
 

I'd prefer 'hoping' to 'wishing' in this context - it's a subtle difference that I can't explain. It just 'feels' like the right verb.
Depending on context, I would probably say:
Hoping that our services can be of assistance in the upcoming event.
rather than:
Hoping that our services will assist you in the upcoming event.
(Though the second is correct).
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Beeesneees
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could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence #3 (permalink) Sat Nov 13, 2010 17:53 pm   could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence
 

Hi, Beeesneees, Thanks for your correction. It is really better than I wrote it before. Could you give me some advice on the following sentence. Best regards

We are dealing office equipment rental service in Hong Kong over 20 years and 4 years in Macau and China.
Our service mainly is to provide the Short-Term OA Rental Service to IT Service Co , Organizer, Exhibitor and Constructor
We have many years experience and full of confidence to fulfill your requirements.
Hknwbec
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Joined: 09 Aug 2010
Posts: 5
Location: Hong Kong

could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence #4 (permalink) Sat Nov 13, 2010 21:59 pm   could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence
 

We have been dealing with office equipment rentals in Hong Kong for over 20 years, and for 4 years in Macau and China.
We mainly provide short-term OA Rental Service to IT service companies, organizers, exhibitors and construction firms.
With our vast experience in the industry and our emphasis on customer satisfaction, we are confident that we can meet all your requirements.

...and though it, of course, depends on context, "Hoping that our services can be of assistance in the upcoming event." sounds rather like the first half of a sentence (Hoping that our services can be of assistance in the upcoming event, we look forward to working with you soon." etc. )
If you are using it on its own, it might sound better, "We hope that our services can be of assistance in the upcoming event." or "We hope that you will seriously consider using our services to assist you in the upcoming event." Though I totally agree that hoping is better than wishing.
Thredder
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Joined: 26 Sep 2010
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could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence #5 (permalink) Sun Nov 14, 2010 17:19 pm   could you tell me anything wrong on this sentence
 

Hi Thredder, Thanks for your valuable advice. I will have a great improvement here if we have your teaching.
Hknwbec
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Joined: 09 Aug 2010
Posts: 5
Location: Hong Kong

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