Parents should give money to praise their child for high marks?

[Ipathigo]

Dear Kitosdad

Could you please correct my essay?

Thank you in advanced. =)

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should give money to praise their child for high marks?

For children, giving them appropriate reward is necessary because they will get more motivation to upgrade themselves. Some people think that giving money for praise is a good reward when children get high marks. Others, however, disagree with the idea. In my opinion, money is not a good prize for children since they can’t use them well.

To begin with, children still don’t have enough concepts about how to use money well. They will use money to buy something they like and will not consider the price. As a result, their rewarding money can be expended easily. For example, my brother, Tom, got some money as award from my mother because he got the first place in his class. When obtaining money, he bought a lot of toys which he expected for a long time. Therefore, he spent all of his rewarding money even his allowance just in a week. From that experience, my mother decided that she would not give him money as the reward anymore.

In addition, giving money as reward will make children think that the purpose of study is earning money rather than pursuing knowledge. Thus, any ways which can help them to have high grades will be used even not all of these are good methods. Take my friend, John, as an example. He ever told me that when he was an elementary school student, he cheated on teats to make his grade could arrive the goal that his mother asked. Indeed, to acquire the money, he already had a severe wrong thought about the purpose of study.

What’s more, children would buy many PC games which have a bad effect on their health because they will spend a lot of time on playing these games even stay up. For instance, my uncle, Peter, a teacher of an elementary school, ever told me that, in his class, a student who always keep good grade on his grade can not focus on classes and he hands in his homework late recently. The result is that he spent much time on PC games so that he can not focus on his grades and classes. That is, children are easy attracted by PC games and will ignore their grades. Therefore, any chances for them to buy PC games are not good ideas.

In conclusion, from what I have discussed above, I think that money should not be a reward when children get high marks. They still don’t have the ability to handle their money well and will misunderstand the purpose of study. Also, it will harm their health.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between two students at their university cafeteria

[Kitosdad]