#2 (permalink) Wed Dec 29, 2010 12:24 pm Re: Integrated essay |
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| Sonla wrote: |
Hi, Mr Kitos. This is the first time I have written integrated essay and I surely I have some mistakes in organization, vocabulary, structure and met difficulties to write an integrated essay. Therefore, I hope you spend more time correcting carefully this essay for me. I will use the corrected essay as a sample for next times. Some people advice that I need to a standard sample to follow; it will help me save time in writing integrated essays. Thanks in advance!
In the lecture, the professor makes several points about what WAS the first grain food in human history. The professor argues that beer, rather than bread, was the first grain food, which was eaten by humans several decades ago. However, the reading contends some proof proving that breAd came first. The professor’s lecture castS doubt on the reading by using a number of points.
The first point THAT THE professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that early people did not need to grind wheat to make beer. According to the professor, wheat would be sprouted naturally in the moist environment without any effort from humans. This differs from the reading. The reading states that in order to make bread, early people must grind wheat seeds first. Then, wheat paste was sprouted by LETTING it sit in the open AIR . The professor disbelieves the reading because the first steps IN MAKING beer are simple and MORE naturAL than making bread. Therefore, people obviously made beer first.
The professor mentions that the fermentation PROCESS in making beer OCCURS very QUICKLY. This differs FROM the reading which indicates that fermentation made people think ABOUT bakING the bread. The point made by the professor casts doubt on the reading because with the fast fermentation resultING in foam, people will FIRST taste it as beer.
Finally, the professor claims that prehistoric man did not know how to use fire to cook However, the reading states after grinding to have wheat paste, people must HAVE HAD TO bake it into bread. This point makes doubt because people have ONLY used fire for cooking FOR tens of decades; early people did not cook things.
In conclusion, the points made in the lecture contrast with the reading. What the professor STATES demonstrate that bread, as the first grain food in human history, is in doubt. ............................................................................................................................. Quite good Sonia.
Kitos. 8.5/10
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