Essay: What country would you like to visit? Can you please evaluate my essay.TY.

[Dhoon824]

Hi. I would truly be appreciated if you would grade my essay. Thank you.

156. You have the opportunity to visit a foreign country for two weeks. Which country would you like to visit? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.

I would love to visit the United States. I’m currently living in South Korea, but I’ve lived in the United States for more than 10 years. I would like to visit my family and friends there in Suwannee, Georgia.

My family lives in Suwannee, which is located in the north of Atlanta, the capital of Georgia. There are 4 members in my family including me. I’m currently going to college in South Korea and eventually have to serve in the military. I had to leave my family to fulfill my dream and duty. It was very hard at first because I’ve never been apart with my family, let alone for a year, and counting. I had a very special bond with my family, a bond like no others. I would love to go visit them and rekindle the previous memories that we have had in the past. Most of all, I would like to have some of my mom’s home cooking. I live by myself in my dorm, so always tend to eat outside, and I’m becoming sick and tired of eating out every day.

I lived in Suwannee for 10 years, and I went to school there. My closest friends still live in Suwannee. I have known them since 3rd grade in elementary school and we’ve been friends ever since. My friends and I also have a special bond like no others, similar to a bond that I have with my family. We are basically distant brothers because we are so close. My friends and I did everything together because we’ve seen each other practically every day. We played basketball on most weekends and mall every other weekends. Even though, the repertoire was mostly the same every weekend, I had the best time because my closest friends were there with me. I would like to visit them and spend our famous weekends with them again.

I have very fond memories of the United States. I’ve lived there for over years. My family and friends still live there. I would like to travel to the United States and visit them.

TOEFL listening lectures: What makes 'The Canterbury Tales' easier to understand?

[Jarico]

Yes great I seen your life style story

[Gianglp]

Hi Dhoon,

I really like your honest writing style. It looks like an excerpt from your dairy than an essay. Try to avoid repetitions like "a bond like no others", "my family", "closest friends" next time :)
_________________
Hope for the best, be prepared for the worst!