A/D Movies and televisions should always show audience good people are being rewa

[EricaLIN]

Dear all,
please help me to correct my essay. Thanks in advance!

Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies and televisions should always show audience good people are being rewarded and bad people are being punished.

The topic of people’s view on whether movies and televisions should always show audience good people are being rewarded and bad guys are being punished can be approached from several different angles due to its complexity. Some people assert that it’s boring to see movies which have similar plot, while others have negative attitudes toward this idea. Despite many diversified opinions aired by different people based on their own favorite, there can be no doubt that movies and televisions which have a conventional plot isn’t my first choice.

The first reason that I want to put forward is that many people watch movies and TV programs just for fun and relaxation. Therefore, they don’t like movies with happy endings and predictable stories all the time. Taking my own experience as an example, I like to see movies with my friends every month and we always have a lot of fun when we discuss the interesting plots together. During that period of time, I felt relaxed and forgot all the stresses and strains of my job. As you can see, seeing entertaining movies is really a valuable way for me to release stresses. That’s why I am greatly convinced that movies and televisions shouldn’t always show audience that good people would have reward and bad people would be punished in the end.

In the second place, movies and TV programs can have an invisible influence on viewing children’s thinking. Therefore, if movies and televisions always show children that good people would have reward, they will believe that no matter how small a good thing they have done should have equal return. Otherwise, they will not have a motive to do some public service. On the contrary, children not take existing movies and TV programs too seriously today just because they have seen a variety of movies. Thus, they have learned how to distinguish between unrealistic stories and realistic world.
Admittedly, movies and TV programs which always show that being a good people would gain more benefits than being a bad guy may teach moral values to the public. In this way, we can live in a peaceful society and people would be more friendly. However, I insist that movies and TV program should show different topics to the audience due to the numerous advantages it would bring about.

Taking all the aspects into account, I believe that all sorts of programs are worth watching and people can benefit from various topics. That’s not to say, of course, others points of view are without merit. However, I hold that the reasons I have provided in favor of my standpoints are stronger.

TOEFL listening discussions: Why did the young woman sit in the rear seat of the car?

[Katty2010]

The topic of people’s view on whether movies and televisions should always show audience good people are being rewarded and bad guys are being punished can be approached from several different angles due to its complexity. Some people assert that it’s boring to see movies which have similar plot, while others have negative attitudes toward this idea. Despite many diversified opinions aired by different people based on their own favorite, there can be no doubt that movies and televisions which have a conventional plot isn’t my first choice.

The first reason that I want to put forward is that many people watch movies and TV programs just for fun and relaxation. Therefore, they don’t like movies with happy endings and predictable stories all the time. Taking my own experience as an example, I like to see movies with my friends every month and we always have a lot of fun when we discuss the interesting plots together. During that period of time, I feEL relaxed and forgEt all the stresses and strains of my job. As you can see, seeing entertaining movies is really a valuable way for me to release stresses. That’s why I am greatly convinced that movies and televisions shouldn’t always show audience that good people would have reward and bad people would be punished in the end.

In the second place,SECONDLY, movies and TV programs can have an invisible influence on viewing children’s YOUNG VIEWER'S thinking. Therefore, if movies and televisions always show children that good people would have rewardS, they will believe that no matter how small a good thing DEED they have done should have equal return THEY WILL GET A REWARD. Otherwise, they will not have a motivIVATION to do some public service. On the contrary, children SHOULD not take existing movies and TV programs too seriously today just because they have seen a variety of movies. Thus, they have learned how to distinguish between unrealistic stories and realistic world.

Admittedly, movies and TV programs which always show that being a good pERSONeople would gain more benefits than being a bad guy may teach moral values to the public. In this way, we can live in a peaceful society and people would be more friendly. However, I insist that movies and TV program should show different topics to the audience due to the numerous advantages it would bring about.

Taking all the aspects into account, I believe that all sorts of programs are worth watching and people can benefit from various topics. That’s not to say, of course, others points of view are without merit. However, I hold that the reasons I have provided in favor of my standpoints are stronger.

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Good Essay but it's of 439 words!! Which is unacceptable in toefl. You should write 300-350words Max.
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[Gianglp]

Hi Katty,

I think there is no upper limit for the length of a TOEFL essay. In fact, I wrote about 430 words for my independent one and it didn't lower my score at all. According to ETS, we SHOULD write about 300-350 to get a good score. They didn't say that we MUST write exactly 300-350 words :)

Sincerely yours,
Giang.
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