Topic: The People who cannot accept criticize; they are unable to be succeeded.

[Neelam2]

Respected Proff. Kitosdad
Good Morning
This is Neelam from India.Please rate my Essay.Please suggest me which area is to be improve.
Topic: The People who cannot accept criticize; they are unable to be succeeded.
It’s true if someone takes criticism in a positive way, He can be improved. Criticism is like a medicine having bitter, pungent taste but it is useful for everybody to be cured. Man cannot get opportunity unless he is criticized. If a student is not pointed with his mistakes; He cannot come to know to know about his or her mistakes. If a person who is always appreciated, He will become haughty, conceited which leads him growing into swollen headed. Then his disgusting behavior set his telethon edges. Gradually he would catch into the snare of disliking, hatred which causes frustration. Eventually he will start declining or deteriorating. Then nothing will be left but regret.
Criticism makes everybody emotionally stronger. He can tackle every adverse situation whenever it arises in life. Recently it happened, during Cricket World Cup India defeated the match which was played between South Africa and India. Indian captain who is called calm, courageous leader but he was criticized for taking the wrong decision as he had given a chance to Ashish Nehra to bowl at the crucial moment which resulted India lost the match. He publically accepted his mistake .In the final because of him India was accolade with the World Cup and Indian Team brought the laurels to their country under his leadership.
So I firmly believe,We should take criticism in a positive way as there is always a scope to be improved, as Sky is the limit.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from a physical science class

[Luschen]

Hi Neelam. I am not an English teacher, but I will comment on your essay. You have a lot of grammatical mistakes in your essay. And I had trouble with your argument of how lack of criticism can end up with "nothing left but regret" Instead of making corrections, I found it easier to rewrite your essay, although I didn't make any changes in what I think are your overreaching arguments. I hope this is helpful - remember, criticism is valuable - ;)

Topic: People who cannot accept criticism are unlikely to succeed.

It is true if someone takes criticism positively, he has the chance to improve. Criticism is like a medicine with a bitter, pungent taste, but useful for helping to cure those who are ill. One will not get the opportunity for improvement unless he is criticized. If a student's mistakes are not pointed out, he will have trouble discovering them. If a person is always praised, he will become haughty and conceited, leading him towards foolish pride. Then his disgusting behavior set his telethon edges. {I do not understand this sentence at all} Gradually he will fall into the snare of hateful behavior, ending in frustration {I do not really understand this argument}. Eventually he will start a process of decline and deterioration. Then nothing will be left but regret.
Criticism makes everyone emotionally stronger. He can tackle every adverse situation whenever it arises in life. Recently in the Cricket World Cup, India was defeated in their match against South Africa. The Indian captain is normally considered a calm courageous leader, but was criticized for his decision to have Ashish Nehra bowl at a crucial moment in the match, resulting in India's defeat. He publicly acknowledged his mistake. In the final match, the captain's improved leadership helped lead India to World Cup victory, with its accompanying laurels.
So I firmly believe one should take criticism in a positve way. There is always room for improvement and "the sky is the limit".

Topic: The People who cannot accept criticize; they are unable to be succeeded.
It’s true if someone takes criticism in a positive way, He can be improved. Criticism is like a medicine having bitter, pungent taste but it is useful for everybody to be cured. Man cannot get opportunity unless he is criticized. If a student is not pointed with his mistakes; He cannot come to know to know about his or her mistakes. If a person who is always appreciated, He will become haughty, conceited which leads him growing into swollen headed. Then his disgusting behavior set his telethon edges. Gradually he would catch into the snare of disliking, hatred which causes frustration. Eventually he will start declining or deteriorating. Then nothing will be left but regret.
Criticism makes everybody emotionally stronger. He can tackle every adverse situation whenever it arises in life. Recently it happened, during Cricket World Cup India defeated the match which was played between South Africa and India. Indian captain who is called calm, courageous leader but he was criticized for taking the wrong decision as he had given a chance to Ashish Nehra to bowl at the crucial moment which resulted India lost the match. He publically accepted his mistake .In the final because of him India was accolade with the World Cup and Indian Team brought the laurels to their country under his leadership.
So I firmly believe,We should take criticism in a positive way as there is always a scope to be improved, as Sky is the limit.

[Neelam2]

Hi Luschen
This is Neelam. I am very very grateful, you spent your precious time in checking an Essay.Dear, there is one line, which was got typed wrong, Actually, It is ....his disgusting behavior set others teeth on edges . It means, People start despising him because of his behavior.

Thank you. I am looking forward for your optimistic approach.

[Luschen]

Hi, thank you for your gratitude. Your explanation is good. I now understand the paragraph better. But I still think your argument is a little too exaggerated - "over the top" is and English idiom I would use.