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Toefl essay: bringing up children in the countryside



 
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Toefl essay: bringing up children in the countryside Mon Mar 27, 2006 18:54 pm  Toefl essay: bringing up children in the countryside
 

It's certainly true that big cities offer to children more opportunities with respect to the countryside: good schools, good sport infrastructures and in general a better offer in term of amusements. However villages and small towns in the countryside are
still better with respect to big cities to grow up children, for some simple reasons.

First, the quality of the environment is better in the countryside. Pollution due to cars and industries is certainly lower with respect to the big cities and children have
the opportunity to live in a healty place.

Second, children have more possibilities to be at direct contact with the nature. They can spend their free time in several open air activities which are important
for their development.

Finally small towns in the countryside are often more safe places with respect to the
big cities. The level of criminality is without any doubt lower and children can
freely go out without the worry of their parents.

For these reasons I think that the countryside villages and smal towns are a good place
to grow up children.

davide
davide
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Toefl essay: bringing up children in the countryside Mon Mar 27, 2006 19:19 pm  Toefl essay: bringing up children in the countryside
 

Hi davide,

I have made some changes in capital letters:

Quote:
It's certainly true that big cities offer to (NO PREPOSITION HERE) children more opportunities with respect to the countryside: good schools, good sport infrastructures and in general a better offer in term of (A BETTER CHOICE OF) amusements. However villages and small towns in the countryside are
still better with respect to big cities to grow (BRING) up children, for some simple reasons.

First, the quality of the environment is better in the countryside. Pollution due to cars and industries is certainly lower with respect to the big cities and children have
the opportunity to live in a healty (HEALTHY) place.

Second, children have more possibilities to be at/IN direct contact with the (NO ARTICLE HERE) nature. They can spend their free time in several open air activities which are important
for their development.

Finally small towns in the countryside are often more safe (SAFER) places with respect to the
big cities. The level of criminality is without any doubt lower and children can
freely go out without the worry of their parents. (WITHOUT THEIR PARENTS HAVING TO WORRY)

For these reasons I think that the countryside villages and smal towns are a good place
to grow (BRING) up children.


Quite good. Try to use other expressions meaning the same as with respect to - concerning/as far as **** are concerned/with regard to.

Alan
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