Get out of your box?

[Political Lurker]

Self-Deception

You're the Wife in this story. Lurker is your husband :-). You're sound asleep after a hard day. At 4 am, your young daughter's cries wake you.

Your thoughts...

"I'd better get up and take care of her ... but I'm tired, I'm so comfortable ... Lurker can do it ... but he is snoring like a pig ... doesn't he hear the kid? ... I work hard all day,plus I did the it last night ... what's wrong with him? ... I'm a good wife ... he's still not up! he's just lazy ... and a lousy dad."

Bang. You've gone from sound asleep to condemning your husband in a few seconds flat.

Here's an overview plus the obvious outcome.

You often intuitively know what a right action toward another person is.
It's 4 am, my kid is crying...I'll go care for her.

An act contrary to what you feel you should do for another is called an act of "self-betrayal."
I'm tired - let Lurker do it.

When you betray yourself, you begin to see the world in a way that justifies your self-betrayal.
I do everything I should do ... work hard, look after the kids and keep an orderly clean house ... I'm a good wife.

When you see a self-justifying world, your view of reality becomes distorted - you begin to deceive yourself.
Lurker is so lazy... insensitive... slacking off...

We call this "entering the box."

Over time, certain boxes become characteristic of you, and you carry them with you.
I'm fine ... all our problems are Lurkers fault because he's lazy, insensitive...

By being in the box, you provoke others to be in the box.
(Lurkers thoughts about you): she's so cold and dismissive...always blaming me ... what a bitch...

In the box, we invite mutual mistreatment and obtain mutual justification. We collude in giving each other reasons to stay in the box. Whereas staying out of the box makes people much more satisfied and happy.

Even if Lurker does snore like a pig.

Amen
_________________
Any day you wake up on "the right side of the dirt" is a good day.

[Eugene2114]

I’m signing off on it. Definitely.
Regards.

[Baalrieth]

Um ... i can't agree with it - why? It's must definitly nonsene, a joke, a gag, a josh. There is no sense in this story.
Or ... what is the moral of this story?