correct my short story please and give your comment

[Fff]

Short story
By Dr.Fawzia AL-hatami
He was leaving his home early in the morning , all of a sudden he heard a huge explosion .He got scared . He entered the university,and before he went to the professor's office, another sight surprised him .Alot of girls shouted and went out from the gate facing the investment and casting lab(the lab in which artificial teeth are made).He ran to see what's going on?.He approached the lab and saw a large cloud of smoke coming from the entrance of the lab .He entered and called" Ram,- Ram" .Ram was a techncician who was responsible for the this lab.A man with dirty face stood behind him " yes Dr.Doni.""what's going on here".Dr.Doni said ," while we were investing the teeth in the machine and Dr.Tony asked me to turn on the machine, I forget to cover it tightly,so a big explosion happened and girls who were making their denture's modals made this commotion because they felt afraid and fortunately there are no victims."Dr.Doni and Dr.Tony were professors in dentistry department .Sarah and Nadeen walked in the university 's garden where a lot of colorful flowers and shadow of the trees lapped them."Sarah, do you think Dr.Tony will accept my practical case to graduate ."Nadeen said"you should believe in yourself if you have done your best.",Sarah replied.Sarah and Nadeen were students at the dentistry college .Each of them have a hope which was graduating and achieving their dream after that.Nadeen wants to establish a large hospital for poor peole in her district ,while Sarah wants to get married as soon as she graduates.The beautiful balloon with dried flowers spread along the hall.Dr.Doni and Dr.Tony were among the professors attendants .A very moving music was heard when the graduate students entered the hall in pretty dress .Sarah's eyes filled with tears; whereas Nadeen smiled when she saw her parents . Photograhs were taken for the graduates.Then quietness filled the hall , the party fishined .Only Sarah was still there crying and whispered " oh ,God make me a good citizen for my country and help me to carry the big responsibility of my major to please everyone in this expandable world ".A Few minutes later , Sarah went outside to sit in the university 's campus with the rest of her colleages.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between a professor and his assistant

[Mreid]

please correct this short story

[Beeesneees]

The first thing that needs to be corrected in that story is the way the punctuation is spaced.
There should be no space between the previous word and a comma or full stop.
There should be a space after the comma or full stop (or equivalent) and before the next word, just as they occur in this message.
There should be no spaces between inverted commas and the phrase that they contain, but there should be a space between the inverted commas and the words outside them, "like this" for example.
There should be no spaces where an apostrophe has been used within a word (university's)
A question mark should not be followed by a full-stop and vice versa. Similarly a comma should not be followed by a hyphen.

Other areas which need correction include:
There is no such word as 'alot'. It should be 'a lot.'
He ran to see what was going on.
A man with a dirty face...
Unless 'investing' is a technical term which I don't know, it is wrong.
'Models', not 'modals'.
professors in the dentistry department
There are sudden changes of verb tense within sentences.

There are more mistakes too, but that should be enough to focus on at the moment. Sensible paragraphing would also help readability.
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Cheers m' dears!