 #1 (permalink) Wed Jul 06, 2011 8:32 am Hello! Rate my essay request |
|
|
Hi, this is a 45min timed essay that i have written for GRE practice test. I know I have a lot of spelling mistakes and that I making up facts. But the GRE doesn't not grade base on these criteria. Please let me know what you think! If possible, please rate on a 0-6 scale (half points accepted!). Thank you, I really appreciate it!
"Important truths begin as outrageous, or at least uncomfortable, attacks upon the accepted wisdom of the time."
The truths we know to day are usually unheard of back then.
They say that ignorance is bliss. This phrase is always true because humans have the innate ability to defend their steadfast beliefs, whether it be right or wrong in the eyes of another. To attack their ideals is similar to a personal attack. The course of history has shown that when new truths, ideas, and beliefs emerges, disagreement will always follow. The response can range from minor discomfort to all out violent war.
When the famous astronomer, Galieo looked at the stars on one starry night, he realized that something was clearly wrong in his observations. It seemed like the stars were always fixed in a pattern. Now how could this be if all of the celestial bodies revolved around earth? Then it struck him- the earth must revolve around the sun! However, this very important fact did not earn him praise in his time. Rather, everyone from his teachers to the local bishops declared him wrong! The world revolved around earth just like the bible say and what ever the bible says is truth. His idea was even considered blasphemous, an attack against God and true wisdom itself. Sadly, it was long after Galieo had died before the idea of the sun being the center of the earth was accepted.
Today, when we see African Americans eating with Caucasians, we think nothing more of it. However, back in the late 1800s, it was considered unlawful for African Americans to even be seen in the same diner. The idea that equality extends to all races regardless of skin color was unheard of. Civil rights leaders like Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks were being admonished by Caucasians who did not want to end segregation and African Americans who did not want to cause trouble. In response, the Klu Klux Clan was committing violent acts and riots occurred within black communities. Even though equality is won today, it was hard and uncomfortable concept for most Americans to understand.
Smoking was generally accepted back in the early 1900s and it became a symbol of sex appeal, status, fame, and wealth. There were no surgeon general warnings and even some doctors recommended smoking in advertisements. When research revealed that smoking was causing lung cancer, everyone disagreed. After all, their parents and friends who smoked did not have cancer. Many thought that it was just overprotective mothers attacking the smoking industry with ridiculous claims. It took a lot of research and education to curb smoking within society.
New truths will always be analyzed and criticized because they clash with what society is already comfortable with. However, this may be both beneficial and harmful. Without vigilance and questioning, how can we know these truths are in fact real? Thus early criticism serve as a type of watchdog for society. Yet, we can not ignore that violence can result if it presents a controversial nature. We can only hope then, that society will weigh the cost of defending an 'important truth' before challenging the status quo.
======================================
Here is the simple version of the grading criteria just in case!
Content: your ability to present cogent, persuasive, and relevant ideas and arguments through sound reasoning and supporting examples
Organization: your ability to present your ideas in an organized and cohesive fashion
Language: your control of the English language, including your vocabulary and diction (word choice)
Mechanics: your facility with the conventions of Standard Written English (grammar, syntax, and effective expression), but not spelling or punctuation |
|
Misocute
New Member
Joined: 06 Jul 2011
Posts: 3
|
