Prohibition of smoke in public places and office buildings

[Anxious]

Hi! Below, there is a pretty short essay of mine. If you correct it, I am going to be very happy. Thanks already!

In some countries, people are no longer allowed to smoke in many public places and office buildings. Do you think this is a good rule or a bad rule? Use specific reasons and details to support your possition.

In these days, many people and lawyers argue about the new rule. That rule is about prohibition of smoking in many public places and office buildings. Although the governments of some countries taxes in high rate from the industry of smoke, smoking is prohibited and that rule includes many public places and office buildings. So, people are divided in two groups which are supporters and opponents of the rule. I am in the first group due to two main reasons.

The first main reason is that many people also do not smoke. For example, many people who do not smoke share public places and their life areas with other people who smoke. In this case, the rules must think them who are non smokers. The most of non smokers are disturbed by the smokers. Because the government of a country should worry about its all citizens, therefore, this rule is good for non smokers.

Another reason is health problems. Smokers do not poison because of cigarette not only themselves but also other people. For instance, there are many non smokers adult and children in public places. Like all people, they want to breathe a clean air. However, since smokers release unhealthy breath, many non smokers have to breathe it. As a result, the rule is good because it does not wrong about non smokers and thinks them.

To sum up, that people are no longer allowed to smoke in many public places and office buildings is not a bad rule because there are many non smokers who share public places and office buildings with smokers and smoking creates health problems on all people.

TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture in the Social Sciences Department

[Katty2010]

These days, many people and lawyers argue about the new rule. That rule is about prohibition of smoking in many public places and office buildings. Although the governments of some countries taxes in high rate from the industry of CIGRATTES, smoking is prohibited and that rule includes many public places and office buildings. So, people are divided in two groups which are supporters and opponents of the rule. I am in the first group due to two main reasons.

The first main reason is that many people also do not smoke. For example, many people who do not smoke share public places and their life areas with other people who smoke. In this case, the rules must think them who are non smokers. The most of non smokers are disturbed by the smokers. Because the government of a country should worry about its all citizens, therefore, this rule is good for non smokers. ALSO PASSIVE SMOKING IS MORE HARMFUL.

Another reason is health problems. Smokers do not poison because of cigarette not only themselves but also other people. For instance, there are many non smokers adult and children in public places. Like all people, they want to breathe a clean air. However, since smokers release unhealthy breath, many non smokers have to breathe it. As a result, the rule is good because it HELPS [s]does not wrong about[/s] non smokers and thinks them.

To sum up, that people are no longer allowed to smoke in many public places and office buildings is not a bad rule because there are many non smokers who share public places and office buildings with smokers and smoking creates health problems FOR all people.

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Hey! Not bad. But I would suggest you include more constructive point of view. Both of your reasons seem somewhat alike. Read as much as possible so you can write better in future. Goodluck!:) 7/10
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Just a confused kid... trying to live through twists & turns of life!
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Everything Is Temporary!

[Anxious]

Thank you so much Katty2010 :)

[Triyoga]

Please, asses my essay on topic:
Some people believe that it is important to make a large amounts of money,while others are satisfied to earn a comfortable living.Analyze each viewpoint and take a stand.
I need your reply soon. Thanks a lot

Some people believe that it is important to make a large amounts of money,while others are satisfied to earn a comfortable living.
The two approacheshave their own benefits depend on one viewpoint. In this essay, I will name some of each benefit and I will take a stand for my position.

In our daily life, there are people who like to work hard even become a workaholic to make a large amounts of money for the sake of living. In this case they want to try to cover everything they want whether it is basic need or just for the secondary or unimportant things. They believe that by having a large amounts of money, they can buy everything they want and save more for guarantee when they are getting old.

On the other hand, there are people who are satisfied to earn a comfortable living. They believe that a happy living does not depend on the amounts of money. According to them, by having a satisfied feeling, they can experience a silent and a comfortable living. They realize that although they do not have much mone, they still have a sufficient and prosperous living.

For my part, I will take a stand for people are satisfied to earn a comfortable living. For me experience a comfortable living is more enjoyable because I believe that everything I need will be affordable depend on how I behave to fill it. It is not the best, but It is my way to face the reality life.

[Triyoga]

Dear Sir/Madam

I need your help to check my essay above.
I look forward to getting your response as soon as possible.

Thanks a lot.

[Triyoga]

Dear Sir,

Please help me to check my essay.
Thanks a lot

[Triyoga]

Dear Sir/Madam,

About a month ago I have posted my essay, but I do not received any responses.
Does anyone can help me to check my essay, please?