Could you check my essay? "Important skill a person should learn"

[Ryo]

Subject:
What is a very important skill a person should learn in order to be successful in the world today? Choose one skill and use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

My Essay:
I think computer skills are most important to be successful for the following two reasons.
One is that computer skills help us work efficiently. If we use several kinds of software which help our work, we can avoid time spending. If we save time on working, we can use time what I need to do for success. For example, business software such as Excel, Power Point, and Word are very helpful in dealing with work. I am worked in an accounting department of a manufacturing company. I am very busy every April because I need to make financial annual reports. When I started to work for my company, I made the reports by myself without any software. I spent around eighty hours a month on finishing the reports. However, now I spend only approximately twenty hours a month on doing so because I use Excel, Access and original programs which can calculate the financial data for me. In addition, I spend the saved time, about sixty hours on studying to qualify as an accountant. If I become an accountant, I will be regarded as a specialist in my company and get more salary.
The other is that by using several information tools, we can get a lot of helpful information. If we can use the internet, e-mail, and social networking etc., we can get useful information anywhere at anytime. To get valuable information rapidly and to make decision based on it are indispensable to succeed in business. For instance, Mr. Sato, my friend could earn a lot of money by using the internet. He was an excellent engineer in a computer company. However, he quit his job and started his business of equity trading. He strongly believed that he could success in his business because he had confidence in his information-gathering skills. He could get up-to-the minute news which might change equity prices, from helpful abroad websites. He could also know good companies which could grow in the future because he could get information of companies’ potential from his investor friends he made by social network. When he started his business, it was very small. However, it continued to earn stable return. As a result, it came to earned one million dollars.
In conclusion, I believe that a person who acquires an information skill could become successful. I think that success depends on saving time and getting valuable information as fast as possible.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture by a professor of Archeology