May you grade my essay for toefl® ibt exam? thank you!

[Ayja]

QUESTION: Telecommuting (work for a company from home rather than in the office and communicating with the office by computer) is becoming more and more common. Discuss the advantages of telecommuting versus working in an office. Then indicate which you prefer and why.

Considerable research has been done on efficiency of telecommuting which means working for a company from home rather than in the office and communicating with the office by computer. Some people support that telecommuting is a useful method which increases the work performance. The others argue that telecommuting leads to waste of time. In my opinion, this issue is quite hard to answer since there are pros as well as cons concerning telecommuting. Still, I prefer working in an office.
Without doubt, telecommuting has many advantages which make business life in today's world simpler. First of all, we can save a lot of time and money each day thanks to telecommuting since we do not have to spend a lot of time and money to go and back to office each day. Telecommuting eliminates such a waste of time. Secondly, we can have control over our work hours. To illustrate, we can start earlier and stop later on a particular day, and work less on another day.
All this is not to say that telecommuting is always better than working in an office. I cannot oversee the fact that, working in an office has significant advantages. For one thing, it is easier to work face to face with people. This communication is also useful and it increases the performance of employees by developing the feeling of camaraderie with people in the office. Because of these reasons, employees have always high concentration and need less self motivation in the office environment.
In conclusion, it seems there are few advantages to telecommuting; saving time and money, and flexible working hours. Nonetheless, it does not seem as the best choice to me. As a new graduate student, it is better for me to work in an office to learn the business discipline and improve my motivation. Taking into account all these facts, in any case, I prefer working in an office.

TOEFL listening lectures: The professor mentions watermelons as an example of what?

[Luschen]

Hi, your grammar and vocabulary are very good. I think you have done an outstanding job. I am not a TOEFL grader, but looking at the guidelines here: http://www.ets.org/Media/Tests/TOEFL/pdf/Writing_Rubrics.pdf I would rate your essay a 5/5.

[Ayja]

thank you so much!