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 #1 (permalink) Mon Feb 13, 2012 22:21 pm please check my essay.thank you |
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Imagine that you were born a man. How you life be different? Explain and give explanation.
The differences between women and men are not only well-documented, but frequently at the heart of jokes. Sometimes people want to start their life from the beginning .If I were a man ,I suppose my life would be different in many ways because of natural differences in physical abilities , the way women’s and men’s brains are structured.
First and foremost, none of us would argue the fact that men and women are physically different. For example, women are more sensitive than men due to physiological basis. If I were a man, I would have a high threshold for a pain, hence it would allows me to be stronger and to perform work required physical power. Moreover, I could keep my emotions and do not cry easily facing difficulties in life.
Last but not least, there is no doubt that men have better mathematical abilities than women. I always want to have practical type of mind in order to study mathematics that was my favorite subject at school, though I do not have natural ability to be the best in it. For example, I do not have good memory for numbers and cannot do in mind mathematical combination; however, these skills I need many times in my life. Therefore, if I were born a man, I could change my career due to new skills that most determined by gender.
Finally, some sports like soccer opens only for male gender. I want to participate in real games, than if I were a man I could enjoy playing my favorite sport.
To sum up, taking into consideration all mentioned explanation for differences between men and women, I believe that if I were born a man I could realize in my life things as being stronger, changing career and playing my favorite sport.
TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture by a professor on the possibility of life on Mars |
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 Krexma
I'm new here and I like it ;-)
Joined: 17 Nov 2011
Posts: 46
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| #2 (permalink) Tue Feb 14, 2012 16:24 pm Re: please check my essay.thank you |
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| Krexma wrote: |
Imagine that you were born a man. How you life be different? Explain and give explanation.
The differences between women and men are not only well-documented, but frequently at the heart of jokes. Sometimes people want to start their life from the beginning. If I were a man, I suppose my life would be different in many ways because of natural differences in physical abilities, and the way women’s and men’s brains are structured.
First and foremost, none of us would disagree with the fact that men and women are physically different. For example, women are more sensitive than men due to differences in physiology. If I were a man, I would have a high threshold for (a) pain, hence it would allow me to be stronger and to perform work requiring physical power. Moreover, I could keep my emotions and I would not cry easily when facing difficulties in life.
Last but not least, there is no doubt that men have better mathematical abilities than women. I always wanted to have a practical type of mind in order to study mathematics, which was my favorite subject at school, though I do not have a natural ability to be the best in it. For example, I do not have a good memory for numbers and cannot do mathematical sums in my head; however, I have needed these skills many times in my life. Therefore, if I were born a man, I could change my career due to new skills that are determined by gender.
Finally, some sports like soccer are available only for males. I want to participate in real games, so if I were a man I could enjoy playing my favorite sport.
To sum up, taking into consideration all the above mentioned explanations for the differences between men and women, I believe that if I were born a man I could achieve things in my life such as being stronger, changing career and playing my favorite sport.
TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture by a professor on the possibility of life on Mars |
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IELTSbuddy
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| #3 (permalink) Tue Feb 14, 2012 16:38 pm Re: please check my essay.thank you |
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Hi, I think you have done a good job. This topic is hard for me, since I like to think that women and men should have the same opportunities, but I admit we are not quite there yet.
| Krexma wrote: |
Imagine that you were born a man. How you life be different? Explain and give explanation.
The differences between women and men are not only well-documented, but frequently at the heart of jokes. Sometimes people want to start their li[ves over] from the beginning .{space}If I were a man ,I suppose my life would be different in many ways because of natural differences in physical abilities [and] the way women’s and men’s brains are structured.
First and foremost, none of us would argue the fact that men and women are physically different. For example, women are more sensitive than men due to [on a] physiological basis. If I were a man, I would have a high[er] threshold for a pain{"pain threshold" is the common term. I don't think this is correct. I have read studies showing that women generally have a much higher pain threshold than man, this may be an adaptation for childbirth. Can you imagine a man going through childbirth?}, hence it[this] would allows me to be stronger and to perform work requir[ing] physical power.{what does a high pain threshold have to do with phyisical strength?} Moreover, I could keep{"control" is a better word here} my emotions and do not cry easily [when] facing difficulties in life.
Last but not least, there is no doubt that men have better mathematical abilities than women. I always want[ed] to have [a] practical type of mind in order to study mathematics that{"which" sounds better here} was my favorite subject at school, though I do not have [the] natural ability to be the best in it. For example, I do not have [a] good memory for numbers and cannot do in [my] mind mathematical combination{say "cannot do mathematical calculations in my mind"}; however, these skills I need many times in my life. Therefore, if I were born a man, I could change my career due to new skills that [are] most[ly] determined by gender.
Finally, some sports like soccer opens[are open] only for [the] male gender. I want to participate in real games, than[so] if I were a man I could enjoy playing my favorite sport. {this is a little short. Also, maybe you need to come to the U.S.! There are mor girls playing football here than boys - this was one of the most exciting football games I ever saw: http://www.usatoday.com/sports/soccer/2011-07-17-usa-japan-wwc-final_n.htm }
To sum up, taking into consideration all[these] mentioned explanation[s ] for [the] differences between men and women, I believe that if I were born a man I could realize{"achieve" is better here} in my life things{"goals" is better here} [such] as being stronger, changing [my] career and playing my favorite sport.
TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture by a professor on the possibility of life on Mars |
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Luschen
I'm a Communicator ;-)
Joined: 08 Apr 2011
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Location: Nashville TN, USA
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| #4 (permalink) Tue Feb 14, 2012 17:59 pm please check my essay.thank you |
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Hello, IELTSbuddy, Luschen,
Thank you very much for your help.
When i was a child,i played handball but wanted soccer, though they use opposite rules.
I see things have changed for good. |
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Krexma
I'm new here and I like it ;-)
Joined: 17 Nov 2011
Posts: 46
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| An integrated essay. Please check it up. | Good book for assay |
