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ESL Story / The behaviour of cats and dogs

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Front gardening I hate
Driving lessons
Learning to teach
Holiday in waiting
What's your sense of direction like?
The scariest thing...?
Do people still get married?
The soccer world cup and 'Wibledon'
Englishes?
The behaviour of cats and dogs
A matter of degree
Are you a nitpicker?
Seriously though
Just me and English
From one extreme to the other
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Putting your foot in it
The language of surprise
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Gerund or infinitive?
How good is your Polish?
The Knoblauch-Garlic Story
How to get to Heraklion?
Negotiating a Commission
What does it take to be a firefigher?
How to start a beauty salon?
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Hooked up
Don't mess with the Russians
China Kid
China Kid (2)
A story behind a family tree
A story behind a family tree (2)
A story behind a family tree (3)
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The behaviour of cats and dogs 
 
Dogs barking is bad enough but cats behaving in a supercilious, superior and snooty way, that's a different matter altogether. Now, I don't like them. I don't see eye to eye with them. We don't click. But in a perverse kind of way (and being like that is another reason for my dislike) they pick on me. They sidle up to me almost in a flirtatious way and rub their backs against my legs and I know they know I can't stand them.

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They've got a touch of the Lorelei syndrome. And it's their attitude that gets me. Take the other morning for example.

There was I making the early morning cup of tea and I chanced to look out of the window and saw a cat, ginger in colour, sauntering across my front grass. You know they have that look about them. He, she (I don't know which gender it was - it wasn't talking at the time so let's call it it, it will be easier if I do) was padding across the grass looking down occasionally and I could sense the disapproval it showed at the length of the grass.

Now clearly cats do nasty things in gardens and I wanted it off my patch. I flung open the window with the intention of frightening it away. But it was what you'd call a hard case. It merely paused with one of its paws that hadn't yet landed, raised and turned round to look at me.

The expression on its face was as if it was asking: Got a problem? I just stared angrily back but it didn't bat an eyelid and proceeded to cross the grass and make its way to the hardstanding on which my car was parked. It was then that I thought I was being silly and went back to the tea ceremony.

Five minutes later I looked out of the window again and saw it (the ginger cat) sitting alongside the back wheel of the car, blinking, halfsmiling and at the same time challenging me to do anything about it. I can tell you, the tea didn't taste good that morning and I just couldn't get over the fact that I'd been upstaged by a cat.

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Next:ESL Story: A matter of degree

Author: Alan Townend




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