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Faulty Sentence?



 
ESL Forum | English Vocabulary, Grammar and Idioms
How to describe the contents of agenda in an English presentation? | (at) any time
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Faulty Sentence? #1 (permalink) Sat Apr 06, 2013 16:53 pm   Faulty Sentence?
 

Without recasting, is this a good sentence, yes or no?

And would you replace 'that' with ' ,which stated the following: '?

Customer Service Manager Jane Doe sent me an email on Thursday 4 May 2013 at 3:14pm that stated the following: ......

Thank you.
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Re: Faulty Sentence? #2 (permalink) Sat Apr 06, 2013 17:35 pm   Re: Faulty Sentence?
 

Yes, but 'which' will be better.

However, if recast, it will look still better.

Customer Service Manager Jane Doe sent me an email at 3:14 pm on Thursday, 4 May 2013 stating the following: ......
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