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Educators and students



 
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Issue Task: The most important characteristics of a society | Argument: Changing a policy
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Educators and students #1 (permalink) Mon Feb 06, 2017 17:58 pm   Educators and students
 

Hi there,

Please help me to imporve my writing for Analytical Task. I am going to take test very soon.

Educators should base their assessment of students' learning not on students' grasp of facts but on the ability to explain the ideas, trends, and concepts that those facts illustrate.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.


Contemporary educators encounter various challenges regarding to their approaches to academic appraisal. As sources of knowledge and examples of critical thinking, educators aspire to deliver educational value by igniting in their students abilities to see patterns behind many, often seemingly different, events, while also encouraging them to think outside the box and challenge the established theories and concepts. Although it is of paramount importance to transcend any context and be innovative, I maintain that students should learn how to identify the core and fundamental laws and trends behind the concrete and mundane experiences of everyday lives in the first place.
For one thing, abstract thinking, that is seeing patterns and commonalities in phenomena around us, is what distinguishes us from other animals. It is this mode of thinking that sparked development of the human civilization. Indeed, without having an ability to understand and explain correlations and cause and effect relationships between facts, people would have stayed at the developmental stage of a 3-year-old child, who is vulnerable and helpless without a support of an adult. Indeed, life is complex, and knowing by a person just the limited amount of facts will not yield any advancements both in his and society’s life, therefore, it is crucially that educators put the emphasis on making sure that students can tie facts they observe with the established theories and truths about our world.
Additionally, the invaluable heritage that the humanity has accumulated so far in the form of statistically significant scientific results and discoveries, well-developed philosophical ideas, and thoroughly studied cultural phenomena, should be assimilated by students in the first place. It is pivotal to recognize the immense value in this legacy for today’s success in any realm of human excellence, and, thus, it should be applicable to each and every student. Take for instance, mechanical engineering, where the unified knowledge of how machines operate at the physical level is indispensable for constructing and designing various automobiles, airplanes, and other vehicles. Or, take medical research that heavily relies on the fundamentals of human body functions, which are identical across population. It is only through recognizing the common patterns of drug effects on seemingly different volunteers for medical research, doctors can discover new treatments for the entire society. In light of this, it is paramount that future professionals are capable of discerning trends and common grounds in a full array of instances; hence educators should test them according to such indicators.
Yet some might disagree saying that only by challenging the established theories and testing commonly accepted approaches do people can revolutionize a society, and therefore, every case should be considered on its own without referring to what is known. Indeed, it might be the case, yet we should acknowledge the fact that before making any real and scientifically based advancements one should be capable of grasping and utilizing what have already been established as the truth and and what the humanity has been building upon for the centuries. Indeed, it is only through passing such knowledge over generations, people have succeeded in solving many problems related to their existence. Given that, educators should make sure that the accumulated knowledge in the form of theories, concepts, ideas are handed in to the subsequent generations, and students are the primary carriers of such knowledge.
Overall, though it might be true that scientific revolution of society is triggered by works of pioneers, we should bear in mind that their success is built upon the established findings which have to be assimilated and utilized before any revolution can happen.
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Re: Educators and students #2 (permalink) Mon Feb 06, 2017 19:55 pm   Re: Educators and students
 

Hi, I'm sorry, but I think your essay could be a little more clear. It has great phrases and excellent vocabulary, but overall, I am not exactly sure which side you are even arguing! Maybe I am just a little slow today :)
The first two paragraphs imply that you support the ideas and concepts sides, but then in your "Additionally the heritage" paragraph, maybe you are supporting the facts side, since the heritage you are talking about seems to be the mass of facts that science has accumulated. And then your "but some disagree" paragraph really through me, since maybe you are saying we need to challenge the established facts, but then you say we need to know the facts first before we can challenge them.
Also, talking about methods of assessment might be a good idea. That is what the whole prompt is about, but you don't really cover that much at all. What are the best specific ways of assessing students? Standardized tests, projects, labs, classroom participation, group work?

Trololo12 wrote:
Hi there,

Please help me to imporve my writing for Analytical Task. I am going to take test very soon.

Educators should base their assessment of students' learning not on students' grasp of facts but on the ability to explain the ideas, trends, and concepts that those facts illustrate.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.


Contemporary educators encounter various challenges regarding to their approaches to academic appraisal. As sources of knowledge and examples of critical thinking, educators aspire to deliver educational value by igniting in their students abilities to see patterns behind many, often seemingly different, events, while also encouraging them to think outside the box and challenge the established theories and concepts. Although it is of paramount importance to transcend any context and be innovative, I maintain that students should learn how to identify the core and fundamental laws and trends behind the concrete and mundane experiences of everyday lives in the first place. {I think you need to mention how students should be evaluated - yes, they should learn this, but you also need to specifically mention that this is how they should be assessed or evaluated or graded}
For one thing, abstract thinking, that is seeing patterns and commonalities in phenomena around us, is what distinguishes us from other animals. It is this mode of thinking that sparked development of the human civilization. Indeed, without having an ability to understand and explain correlations and cause and effect relationships between facts, people would have stayed at the developmental stage of a 3-year-old child, who is vulnerable and helpless without a support of an adult. Indeed, life is complex, and knowing by a person {this sounds odd - maybe "and a person's knowing just ..."} just [a ] limited amount of facts will not yield any advancements [neither] in his [nor] society’s life, therefore, it is [crucial] that educators put the emphasis on making sure that students can tie facts they observe with the established theories and truths about our world.
Additionally, the invaluable heritage that the humanity has accumulated so far in the form of statistically significant {"statistically significant" sounds odd in this context} scientific results and discoveries, well-developed philosophical ideas, and thoroughly studied cultural phenomena, should be assimilated by students in the first place. {"in the first place" is a bit odd here - I think it is almost always used when a mistake or a bad choice has already been made - like "Additionally, .... phenomena should have been assimilated by students in the first place, instead of waiting until college when it is often too late."} It is pivotal to recognize the immense value in this legacy for today’s success in any realm of human excellence, and, thus, it {I am not exactly sure what this "it" refers to, maybe restate it instead of using a pronoun} should be applicable to each and every student. Take for instance, mechanical engineering, where the unified knowledge of how machines operate at the physical level is indispensable for constructing and designing various automobiles, airplanes, and other vehicles. Or, take medical research that heavily relies on the fundamentals of human body functions, which are identical across population {"across populations" or "across the population"} . It is only through recognizing the common patterns of drug effects on seemingly different volunteers for medical research, [can] doctors can discover new treatments for the entire society. In light of this, it is paramount that future professionals are capable of discerning trends and common [ground] {or "facets/areas/points of common ground"} in a full array of instances; hence educators should test them {I would say more specifically who "them" is, as it is not really "professionals" - maybe "students of graduate schools"} according to such indicators.
Yet some might disagree[,] saying that only by challenging the established theories and testing commonly accepted approaches do [can] people can revolutionize a society, and therefore, every case should be considered on its own without referring to what is known. {this is confusing to me - what does this have to do with only testing students on their knowledge of the facts?} Indeed, it might be the case, yet we should acknowledge the fact that before making any real and scientifically based advancements one should be capable of grasping and utilizing what ha[s ] already been established as the truth and and what the humanity has been building upon for the centuries. Indeed, it is only through passing such knowledge over generations, [that] people have succeeded in solving many problems related to their existence. Given that, educators should make sure that the accumulated knowledge in the form of theories, concepts, ideas are handed in to the subsequent generations, and students are the primary carriers of such knowledge. {but isn't this what you argued in the earlier paragraphs - this is not really a contrast, in what way do these people disagree?}
Overall, though it might be true that scientific revolution of society is triggered by works of pioneers, we should bear in mind that their success is built upon the established findings which have to be assimilated and utilized before any revolution can happen.
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Educators and students #3 (permalink) Tue Feb 07, 2017 8:13 am   Educators and students
 

Hi Thomas,

Indeed, I was not clear enough and should have been more precise. I'll work on that. Thanks a lot!
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Trololo12
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Joined: 28 Mar 2012
Posts: 283
Location: Russia

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